Friday, September 11, 2009

The Perfect Wife - Chapter 38


We drove back to the hotel quietly holding hands like any normal couple. Today was so monumental for me. I hoped and prayed I made the right decision by staying. I knew the chances that I would ever have such a clear opportunity to leave again were slim to none. But at that moment it just felt like the right decision. Now here I was, twenty minutes later, chewing my lip and second-guessing myself. What if I was wrong? What if it was the wrong choice? What if all of this was only a temporary reprieve? What if I just blew my only chance at survival? Oh God, what have I done?

I think I’d come to one absolute, rock solid, carved in granite, take it to the bank conclusion. I hated the words ‘what if’ and ‘maybe’ probably more than any other words in the English language. I suddenly felt very tired. I released a heavy sigh and leaned my head in my hand that was braced on the car door. I felt Edward release my other hand before feeling it slip under my hair to massage my neck. I closed my eyes. He was so good at that.

“Mmm.” I didn’t even bother to hold back the moan of appreciation.

“Are you alright?” he asked, slowly running his thumb up and down the side of my neck.

“Um-hum,” I mumbled, keeping my eyes closed. I wasn’t ready to talk just yet. I was too unsure of myself right now. I just needed to get a grip.

“Bella?” he prodded.

I squeezed my eyes closed tighter. “Not now, alright? I want to talk, but not until we’re in our room. Okay?” I requested.

I felt his hand still a moment before starting to massage my neck again. It took me all of half a second to realize what I’d done. I’d just turned him away without even a thought. I opened my eyes and turned to look at him. I stared at his profile for a moment but couldn’t see any of the usual signs of anger in his expression.

“Edward?” I asked softly.

He glanced at me and reached down taking my hand in my lap bringing it to his lips. He smiled and held my hand to his chest.

“We’ll talk in our room, just a few more minutes. I just have to get us through all this traffic.”

He kissed my hand again before releasing it back into my lap and returning to massaging my neck. This time when I closed my eyes, I felt the excess moisture that had welled up, not enough to fall but enough to wet my lashes. I took a deep breath releasing it. I’d made the right choice. I didn’t make a mistake. I reached up and gently pulled Edward’s hand from my neck. I kissed the back of his hand and held it against my cheek. I felt his thumb brush my jaw and smiled.

Nothing else was said in the car, and we arrived back at our hotel without further incident. Once in our room, Edward went to drop the bags in our bedroom and I got a couple of waters out of the mini-fridge as I kicked off my shoes and curled up on the sofa to wait for him.

Now that it was time to talk I had no clue how to begin. How did you negotiate your future with a fiancé you didn’t choose? Ours wasn’t a normal relationship by any stretch of the imagination. Now, however, everything was changing and we were going to find a way to be ‘normal.’ At least that was what I hoped Edward was agreeing to.

I’d made a split second decision to stay with him based really on two days’ behavior. What rational person did that? I’d either have to say I was the only one or I wasn’t rational; I was insane. I guess we’d see soon enough.

Edward came back in the room and sat on the sofa with me, taking the water I offered. I watched him as he took a long drink before setting the bottle down beside mine and turning to me. I had my legs curled up on the sofa, facing him, and smiled as he brought his arm up to rest on the back of the sofa. He seemed to be deep in thought, staring at his hand that was playing with a lock of my hair.

The silence was almost deafening as I tried to figure out what to say to begin this talk and Edward worked out whatever was on his mind. He finally looked up and our gazes locked together.

“Bella,” he started, breaking our silence. “Why didn’t you leave when you had the chance?”

I stared down at my hands, rubbing my palms back and forth on my thighs, while searching in vain for the words to explain what I was thinking and feeling at that moment in the mall. I struggled to put my thoughts together into a cohesive explanation that would make sense, but the more I tried, the more muddled my thoughts became. I finally gave up and decided to just let whatever words came fall out of my mouth, and hope they made sense.

I looked up at Edward, who was still waiting for my explanation, and took a deep breath. I sent up a quick silent prayer that I wasn’t going to sound stupid and juvenile to him. However smart my mom and Phil thought I was, I was still just seventeen and I was so afraid my reasons would prove just how naïve and immature I really was to him.

“I --” I hesitated.

“I --” I tried again to get the explanation to come forth.

“I --” I huffed. I drew my knees up to my chest dropping my head in my hands and gripped my hair in frustration.

“Ugh! I hate this!” I began mumbling to myself, forgetting Edward was even there. “I knew exactly what I wanted to say to you in the parking lot when you were holding me. It was crystal clear in my head.”

I jumped up from the sofa, unable to sit still in my frustration, and began pacing the room. I bemoaned my inability to put into words what was in my mind. And maybe in my heart?

“Why is this so freaking hard now?” I continued to ignore the fact that Edward was sitting and quietly observing my little monologue. My hands were flying all over the place as I tried to work out what I needed to say. I always thought better when I was moving. “I just want to tell you that you make me happy now. I’m not scared of you anymore. I feel like me again. I don’t even feel like a Barbie doll right now. You did this. You let me yell at you, and even when I gave you the belt, you didn’t hit me.

“You knew I needed to cry at the cemetery and you held me and comforted me. You laughed with me today. You’ve never really laughed with me before, not like normal couples do. I’ve never dated anyone, but I’ve seen Janie and Scott together. Today was just like them. I was having so much fun for the first time in forever that I forgot everything else. For the first time since entering this nightmare I was really happy. I could almost pretend that we were dating like normal people. It felt normal. I want normal. I freaking earned it and I’m not about to give it up. You’ve given me the best gift I could ever expect from you short of my freedom…”

I stopped short as it all fell into place. I looked over to Edward still sitting on the sofa, realizing that he’d just sat there silently through my rant. He had the strangest look on his face. He looked like he was in pain. I had to see the answer for myself. I walked over and kneeled onto the sofa with my legs straddling his lap. I held his face in my hands and searched for the confirmation of the truth in his eyes while he held my hips gently waiting for me to continue. I looked down into his eyes and felt those emotions bubbling up inside of me again. I felt the tears start to fall again as I stared into his eyes.

“You did that. You wouldn’t have stopped me today, would you?” I asked in wonder.

“No, I wouldn’t,” he admitted softly. He reached up to tuck my hair behind my ear giving me a gentle smile that melted my heart. “Today I would have let you go if that’s what you wanted.”

Somehow deep inside of me I’d known that. In that moment before walking away from him in the parking lot I’d known. Edward loved me enough that he would have let me go. Now I just had to learn to love him in return. A part of me knew I was already falling for my Edward. I knew now that it wouldn’t be hard to fall completely in love with him, the real Edward. Esme’s Edward. I smiled at the thought. My Edward and Esme’s Edward were the same man, only she knew and loved the boy. I was going to know and love the man. I had my answer for him now.

“I stayed because in that moment I wanted to be with you. I wanted to see what a future with you would be like. I stayed because I’ve given you my trust, not to hurt me and to love me for who I am. I stayed because I guess I really do care about you and I want to learn to love you as much as you say you love me.”

I leaned forward to curl up into his arms and gazed into his face with his dazzling crooked smile and his brilliant, emerald-green eyes that looked at me with so much love and emotion. Not a hint of Carlisle’s Edward to be found.

“I stayed because today you would have let me leave.” There was no other explanation needed than that. He would have let me go. I had seen it in his eyes. Today had really been my choice to stay. If I’d gotten into the car with the police officer and left, I would have been free.

One thing I’d learned in my time in Forks is that the Cullens were powerful and had the money to get away with anything. No one stopped them, the way we lived, and how I came to Edward proved this. If today had been any different and Edward hadn’t been willing to let me leave, I might have gotten away in that moment but one way or another I would have been back within 24 to 48 hours, tops.

I reached up and pulled his face to mine, kissing him with all the feeling inside of me. He returned my ardor with equal passion. I felt him slide his tongue between my parted lips and I welcomed him into the warm embrace of my mouth. I turned toward him more so that I could wrap my arms around him and felt Edward wrap his hand around my thighs, pulling me closer. I sucked and stroked his tongue with mine before slipping my tongue into his mouth. He groaned into my mouth and our tongues danced together between us.

I felt a hand quickly slide up under the back of my shirt and come around to cup my breast, pulling down the cup of my bra and pinch my nipple. He pulled me tighter into his hips grinding me into his pelvis.

I felt the evidence of what our kissing was doing to Edward and carefully began to pull back. My body responded to his every touch, but I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want to just continue our physical relationship as if nothing had changed between us. I know it sounds silly. We were really moving backwards in our relationship. I’d been with Edward for months; we’d done just about everything physical you can short of actually having sex. I knew by choosing to stay with him today I was agreeing to ultimately marry him in the end, but now we were really just getting to know each other. It didn’t feel right to continue the rest until I was more secure in my feelings with Edward. I could only hope he understood and wouldn’t be too angry with me.

“Edward,” I urged softly breaking our kiss. “I need to stop. Please?”

He rested his forehead against mine, breathing deeply, still holding me tightly in his arms. His eyes were shut tight as he fought for control. His hand was still cupping my bare breast.

“Please? I’m so--” I began, afraid to move in case he was angry.

“Bella,” he halted me, “don’t. I promised whatever you were comfortable with now. I’m trying. I just need you so much. It’s hard for me to stop, but I will. Just give me a minute.” He continued to hold me as his breathing slowed back down. He pulled the cup of my bra up over my breast and slid his hand out from under my shirt, letting it rest on my thigh. He finally opened his eyes to me. I could still feel his arousal but his eyes were no longer as dark.

“I guess I should put away the stuff we bought. Will you teach me to play chess this afternoon?” I asked, trying to distract him from his problem.

“That sounds like a good idea,” he agreed. He stood, helping me to my feet as well. “I’ll get the board set up on the table while you’re doing that.”

“Alright.” I went back into the bedroom and pulled out the bag from the game store and took it to Edward to set up.

“Here you go,” I said, handing him the bag. I stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek.

“Thank you, love,” he responded. I could still see the lines of tension around his mouth.

I went back into the bedroom and started pulling everything out of the bags. I went to the closet and realized something. Hotels don’t give you a lot of hangers. I stared at the clothes laid out on the bed and my clothes hanging in the closet. I chewed my lip as I thought about what to do. I released my lower lip and shook my head as I laughed quietly to myself. ‘Things were certainly different today,’ I thought as I began pulling the clothes I hated off the hangers and dropping them into a pile on the floor.

I got to choose what I wanted to wear now so these would go. I left only the couple of shirts and a dress I actually liked then hung up my new clothes on the now empty hangers. I would need Edward to take me shopping when we got home also so I could replace those things as well. I didn’t know what to do with the stuff I didn’t want to wear ever again. I picked everything up off the floor and stuffed them into the empty shopping bags and headed back out to the sitting room. It was time to learn something that was my choice to learn.


I spent a couple of hours teaching Bella the basics of chess; the names of the pieces and the moves they could make. She caught on quickly and I loved seeing the excitement and joy in her eyes as we played. It was a quick game since she would need to learn strategy before she gave me any real challenge, but I knew we would have a lifetime for her to learn.

She chose me today. My worst nightmare was washed away. I understood what Jasper meant when he told me what it would mean to have Bella choose me on her own. I broke down like a baby in that parking lot. I was so overwhelmed with emotion when she called me her fiancé, the fact that she didn’t run away from me when she had the opportunity.

I owed my brother so much for everything. I fought his advice every step of the way, determined to be right in how I handled Bella. I was a fucking idiot. Every time I followed his advice I made Bella happy. Every time I did things my way I hurt her emotionally and physically. How did I forget everything my mother taught me as a child? I saw it now that I was willing to look inside myself through the eyes of an adult; my mother secretly teaching us how to treat a woman with respect, not to be afraid to show love when we found it.

Then to forget everything she taught me in one night, the night I earned my father’s highest praise for humiliating my mother. I was so proud of myself. I strutted around at my brothers because I won his fucking challenge. I was a fourteen year-old punk and should have had my ass kicked for what I did to her, not rewarded for it. I didn’t stop to think about how it hurt my mother. I only saw the pride in his eyes, pride he so rarely showed me.

I was never good enough for him. If I made an “A” in class, why wasn’t it an “A+”? When I played basketball, why didn’t I score more points for my team? It was never enough for him. He was the reason I got where I am in life as fast as I have. I craved his attention, his praise. He withheld it knowing it was the best way to manipulate me. He used it to mold me into an exact replica of himself. I became a monster for him.

Choosing Bella to become my wife was the best decision I’d ever made in my life. She slew the monster within me. I could feel the difference within and I reveled in it. I didn’t think anyone else would have been able to affect me the way Bella had. I wanted to make her happy and earn her love. I knew today that eventually she would love me. We would have the perfect marriage that I craved. It would be like George and Maddie Owens. Bella knew and accepted my faults. However, there were no faults to accept in Bella; she was perfect in every way.

I shook myself from my thoughts as the bedroom door opened to see my Bella walking out in one of her new outfits. She was dressed in a bright pink top and white eyelet swing skirt with ballet flats. She smiled shyly at me. This was new; never before had she thought about her appearance. Probably because I chose all her clothing before so knew I always liked how she looked.

“Do I look okay?” she asked timidly as she walked up to stand in front of me. She looked so cute peeking up at me through her lashes and chewing on her bottom lip.

I held my hand above her and made a motion for her to turn around for me. I didn’t really need her to do it, she looked beautiful as always, but I wanted to play with her a bit.

“Turn around and let me see you.” I grinned as she turned slowly for me, watching my face the whole time.

“Well? Is it?” she asked nervously.

I stepped back and tapped my finger against my lips, contemplating my answer. “Hmm, I don’t know,” I answered slowly. I saw the look of doubt in her eyes and realized it was too soon for her to recognize I was only teasing her. I quickly took her hand and pulled her into my arms, tilting her chin up to look at me. I gave her a quick kiss and smiled reassuringly at her. “Yes, Bella, you look beautiful. You are always beautiful to me.”

I was rewarded with her pink tinged cheeks and shy smile, the twinkle back in her eyes for me. “Thank you,” she answered. She ran her hand across my chest, brushing imaginary lint from my black button down shirt. “You’re pretty handsome yourself,” she grinned.

I could feel my stomach tighten and wished I could take her back into our bedroom. I was going to have a hard time controlling myself around her. This afternoon proved that point. When she pulled back and told me to stop, I wanted to pin her down on the sofa and show her who was boss. I needed to be able to touch her. My body physically craved her body. My heart craved all of her, her heart, her mind, and her body. The real prize was in winning all of her and I knew this meant fighting my physical cravings. I wanted the whole package that was Bella. Today I won a small part of her heart. She chose me on her own. Now I just needed to win the rest. I’d reminded myself of my promise again and stepped back from her touch.

I cleared my throat. “So where’s this steakhouse you were telling me about?” I asked as I led her to the door.

Bella gave me directions to the restaurant and shared more stories of her mom and stepfather. Her life before me sounded ideal, something out of a fairytale, at least in comparison to my own childhood. I could hear the love in her voice for them and could picture them laughing together as a family. I was envious of the relationship she had with them. She openly loved her mother, and from everything she said and the home movies I watched it was obvious, she loved her stepfather and he loved her as well.

I wanted Christmas mornings around a big tree. I wanted to play Santa for our children like Bella told me Phil did for her. I wanted to see her belly swollen with a child, with a couple of little munchkins running around at her feet. She’d be tired at the end of the day from taking care of our children and home. When I came home from the hospital at night, she’d be glad to see me, her eyes filled with love for me. I’d kiss her lips and her belly, telling her how much I loved her. Our children would run to me and I’d take them outside to toss a ball while Bella finished our dinner. I wanted to have picnics in our living room at night, everyone loving and laughing while Bella made popcorn for us to eat. I wanted this life with Bella.

This was love, not the watered down twisted thing my father had for my mother or even for us. Listening to her talk, I came to the realization that I never heard my father say he loved us. I’d never heard him say he loved my mother either. I wondered what led him to become the man I knew. I would love to know if he loved my mother at all, and if so, how he could possibly think everything he did to her was okay.

The hostess tried to flirt with me when she led us to our table, but I only had eyes for my beautiful Bella. There was no other woman in the world beside her. I vaguely heard her mention our waiter’s name as she walked away. I saw Bella open her menu and stopped my automatic response to take it from her. I shook my head in disgust at myself as I opened my own menu. So many things ingrained in me I would need to relearn.

“So what’s good here,” I asked. It felt strange asking her what I should eat instead of telling her what to eat.

“Everything is good. Phil always liked the T-bone, mom liked the filet mignon, and I like their peppered steak salad or fried catfish. I think I want the catfish tonight. I’m in the mood for their squashpuppies.”

I cocked my eyebrow at her. “Squashpuppies? What on earth are those?”

“They’re hushpuppies with yellow squash mixed into the batter.” She grinned mischievously at me. “If you let me get chocolate cake for dessert, I might let you try one.”

I took her hand on the table and brought it to my lips. I winked at her as I kissed her hand. “You got yourself a deal, my love.”

Bella’s eyes continued to twinkle the entire evening. She loved it when I bowed to her knowledge of fantastic cuisine. From now on, if Bella told me something was good, I didn’t care if she told me we were having mountain lion and fried grizzly paws for dinner. If Bella said it was good I would eat it. I was only sorry squashpuppies didn’t come with my steak.

Bella winked and told me the recipe was in a cookbook at her home. I told her to be sure that book came with us. I saw the twinkle dim at the mention of packing up her home. I worked to bring the twinkle back as quickly as possible. I didn’t want to see her sad.


“Checkmate,” I said.

“Ugh, this game is so hard,” Bella complained. “I swear I’ll never be able to win. I know the pieces and what they do. What am I doing wrong?”

“It just takes time to learn the strategy. You’ll get it,” I reassured her. She was so cute when she pouted. I just wanted to suck her bottom lip between mine and never let it go.

I saw her try unsuccessfully to stifle a yawn. “I want to try aga-again,” she yawned eventually.

I chuckled at her. She was obviously tired and too stubborn to call it a night. I stood from the table and scooped her up into my arms. She squealed, and then quickly buried her face in my chest to hide another yawn.

“I don’t think so,” I whispered softly. I carried her to our bedroom and set her on the side of the bed.

I went to the dresser and pulled out her raspberry pajama set. I turned back to her in time to see her mouth stretch in a huge yawn.

“Excuse me,” she grinned sheepishly.

“That’s okay, love. I know you’re tired. Here, lift your arms,” I told her.

I helped her undress and put on her pajamas. I swallowed hard at seeing her bare breasts before me. I struggled but successfully managed to dress her without touching her the way I wanted.

She lay down and I sat beside her to rub her back. I wasn’t coming to bed yet and I wanted her asleep before I left the room. I had a call to make that I didn’t want her to overhear.

“Bella, go to sleep. I know you’re tired,” I said. “I’ll be to bed in a few minutes.”

She shouldn’t have any nightmares tonight but I knew I’d be in bed before she started sleep talking just in case. She finally dozed off and I covered her before leaning in to kiss her cheek and left the room.


Edward noticed my yawn and picked me up, carrying me to bed. He rolled me onto my stomach and lay down beside me rubbing my back. I closed my eyes and hummed in appreciation. It felt so good.

“Bella, go to sleep. I know you’re tired,” he said. “I’ll be to bed in a few minutes.”

This was one of those times I didn’t mind Edward’s highhandedness as I yawned again and nodded. He leaned down to kiss my cheek and pulled the blanket over me before leaving the room. I heard the door quietly click shut and was left in darkness. I thought about our day and what it would be like to have a lifetime of days like today, a lifetime of Edward’s laughter and kindness. To accept the intense love he would give me, as I would learn to love him in return. I would be safe from anyone ever hurting me again. Edward would never let anyone hurt me I knew that now. As I drifted off to sleep, I decided to rethink my decision to keep Carlisle’s threat a secret from Edward. I would let my trust in Edward grow and when I felt completely safe with him I would finally tell him.


I quietly shut the bedroom door so Bella could sleep. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed Jasper’s number as I grabbed a bottle of water. I sat on the sofa and propped my feet up while I waited for him to answer. I had so much to talk to him about.

It was hard to believe we’d only been in Phoenix a few days, but it felt like Forks was a lifetime ago. I could feel the shift inside of me; the shift from the man my father raised me to be to the man my mother raised me to be. I couldn’t wait to get home and talk to her. I owed my mother such a huge apology for the way I treated her over the years. I couldn’t wait to tell her I loved her. My mother would be my first priority when we got home. My apology was long overdue.

Second priority would be to offer whatever incentive the builder would need to finish our home as quickly as possible. I’d pay for a bigger crew if that was what he needed. I wanted to start our picture perfect life just as soon as we could.

I’d need to stop at Mr. McGee’s shop the week we get home so I can pick up Bella’s ring. It was time to make us official. I thought a summer wedding would be best. There was no way I could wait for a Christmas wedding now. I was going to spontaneously combust if I didn’t get to relieve my physical needs soon and I’d only gone without for two days.

I’d need to talk with Carlisle about the timing for voiding the adoption. I knew he made sure the attorney left in that loophole so I wouldn’t have any problems marrying Bella.

I was so busy making a mental list that I was startled when I heard someone yell in my ear.

“Edward! So help me, you better not have hurt her! Answer me, damn it!” I heard my brother yell into the phone.

“Jasper? What the hell are you yelling about?” I asked. I was confused and angry at his accusation. “Why is your first assumption always that I’ve hurt Bella?”

“Edward, what am I supposed to think? You call me, then don’t respond when I say ‘hello.’ I’ve been trying to get your attention for the past couple of minutes. What else was I supposed to think?” he justified.

“Well, I didn’t. I was just thinking and wasn’t paying attention to the fact you had answered. Alright?”

I heard him sigh in relief. “Alright. I’m sorry. You just scared me for a minute. So, what’s up?”

“I need your help with something. Bella’s parents bought her a car for her birthday before they died. She didn’t know. We found it in the garage at the house. I want to ship it home as a surprise for her. Can I store it in your garage until I give it to her?” I asked.

“You’re actually going to let her keep it? Wow. Who are you and what have you done with my brother?” he laughed.

“Well if that impresses you then you better be sitting for this one. I’m not selling the house,” I said smugly. There was silence on the other line for a split second before I heard a shrill screech in my ear. I should have known Alice would be nearby and listening. It amazed me that it didn’t annoy me like it would have in the past.

I heard noise as she evidently took the phone from Jasper. “Hello Alice,” I chuckled.

“Oh Edward, Bella must be so excited. What did she say when you told her?” she asked.

“I haven’t told her yet. I just decided tonight. I’ll tell her tomorrow when we go back to finish packing her pictures and things.”

“How is Bella doing?” she asked.

“Things are really good between us, Alice. Now I hate to cut you off because I can tell you have a million questions, but I really need to talk to Jasper for a bit, okay? I promise to have Bella call you tomorrow and you can talk to her yourself. Just don’t tell her about the house or the car. Those are a surprise, alright?”

I pulled the phone from my ear quickly as she squealed in excitement. “Here’s Jasper. Don’t forget, you promised I can talk to her tomorrow.”

“I won’t forget. Now can I talk to Jasper?”

I heard my brother laugh as he took the phone back from his wife. “Hey Pixie, would you mind making up some of the cookie dough and I’ll make coffee when I get off so we can cuddle by the fireplace tonight?”

I heard kissing noises on the phone before my brother remembered I was still on the line. I heard Alice’s feet skip - or so it sounded - away. I shook my head and thought of seeing Bella that happy. I smiled at the mental picture I’d created in my mind this afternoon of our home life.

“Sorry Edward. What did you need?” he asked.

“I just wanted to be sure she got the flowers I ordered,” I asked nervously.

Watching Bella at the cemetery had made me think of my own mother. I knew flowers didn’t make up for everything, but I didn’t want to wait to tell her I loved her. Sitting in a cemetery brought home how short life can be, how quickly something can snuff out a life. I didn’t want to wait one second to let my mother know I was thinking about her. I’d ordered the largest arrangement of spring flowers to be delivered to Jasper’s house for her. I didn’t want my father to know about them so he wouldn’t get suspicious or throw them out. They were for her.

“Yeah, she got them. She cried for half an hour over the card alone. She comes by the house several times a day to smell them and read the card again. She said if you called again to tell you they’re beautiful and she understands. She said she’ll see you when you come home.”

I finished my conversation making the necessary arrangements for Bella’s car and hung up the phone. As I crawled into bed and spooned into Bella’s back I smiled. I had made good decisions in my relationship with my mother and my Bella. And best of all I had made these decisions on my own. I was going to be able to do this after all. I would make my mother proud of me. And Bella was going to love me and we’d have a wonderful life and marriage.


  1. These are such good, solid first steps. I preay that Edward can continue the forward momentum he has with his new relationship with Bella when his father is around. Hopefully the little tidbit that Bella shares about Carlisle will not hurt her, but solidify her feelings for Edward. When is 39 going to be posted??

  2. Loved it. Such a great chapter. Edward is trying so hard. He still worries me a bit. But is he getting there. I wonder what he will do when he finds out about Carlisle. Can't wait to read more

  3. holy crap!!!!
    im soooooo glad there's more!!!
    ahhhhhh!!!! this chapter was just wonderful!
    i absolutely loved it
    and i loved that bella realized that he really does love her
    and im soooooooooo proud of edward
    and hes keeping the car and the house!?!?! yayyyyyy!!!!

    i loved knowing about the flowers too
    and im so excited for the reunion with esme and him

    i am glad that bella also realized she can tel edward about carlisle when she feels he's trustworthy... i just hope its soon before carlisle can get to her

    update soon!!!!!

  4. Ahh. I wish I could read the note Edward sent Esme.
    This chapter made me happy, as the recent few have been doing, as well, as Edward is improving so much. :D
    I'm glad he's not selling the house or the car, and I do wish he would let her go to college, as well, although I know the chances of that are slim to none. :P

    And you should be feeling pretty damn good about yourself, because I made a Blogspot account just so I could review this. :P

  5. So glad he sent his mom the flowers. And the B is thinking of telling E about C and his butt fetish. Scared of what C is going to do when they get home thought

  6. I absolutely loved this chapter. Definitely the best one so far. :D

    I'm so glad that Edward is keeping the house and Bella's car, I was so worried that he wouldn't keep them.

    It makes me so happy that Edward is working on his relationship with Esme and really becoming a good boyfriend/fiance and son. :D

  7. I am so proud of Edward. He is taking big steps in the right direction. The flowers for his mother were such a wonderful idea. Again, though, I worry about what will happen when they go back to Carlisle's house. How will Edward explain all the new clothes? They need to have a long talk about how they will act there so that Carlisle won't get too suspicious (because we know he will...).

  8. OMG. really really awesome. Ok anyone else worried about the paragraph where he talk about bella pregnant, surrounded by kids, making popcorn. i mean..... um what if she wants to work? what if she doesn't want lots fo kids? what if she is tired and wants him to make dinner or popcorn? I think he will forget his ways... when pressed. I hope Bella does not end up paying as a result. So tell me this is a HEA right?

  9. OMG this was so worth the wait and how great is romanticward?

    It makes me sad about what will happen when they go back and Carlisle burst his lil bubble.

  10. Great chapter. I'm so glad that Edward is really trying and Bella sees this. As much as I can't wait to read their first time love making I totally understand why Bella wants to wait. I can not wait to read when he tells her he is not selling the house. I do hate that they still have to stay with Carlise. Can't they stay with Alice and Jasper until the house is built? Gosh, I can't stand Carlise.
    Now, we are seeing the Edward we all know and love. Please update soon...

  11. Awesome chapter, I loved it

    @Funkydiva My eyes grew big when i read that too Bella popping babies and in the kitchen hmmm....

    I can't wait to see what happens when they come back... :D

  12. Yay! She's going to tell Edward about Carlisle's promise to ass-rape her! She;s trusting hum and he's actually earned it! Personal growth is amazing.

    Awesome chapter. So glad you are continuing this. Going back to Forks is going to be so hard, but I'm glad to see Ed taking steps toward being a human and not just a puppet to Evil.

  13. She had the choice, it was up to her and she chose him. Bella is trusting Edward is picking him and her instead of just her. That's really amazing!!
    Edward is a changing man, he is giving us all a huge surprise. Esme is going to be so proud of him when she hears everything that Bella and him will have to tell her when they get back.
    Jasper is also very proud of his brother and will do everything in his power to help him with his surprises for Bella.
    And Bella today shocked everyone starting with herself two weeks ago she would have laughed if someone told her what she would choose today. But love can make people do things that might seem out of character.
    But as great as the day was, they still have to go back and see Carlisle. Lets hope he doesn't get too suspicious or sees something they don't want him to see.

  14. Thrilled beyond belief that Bella made that realization and that Edward is being so kind to her. But it seems to me that Edward is being a little overly optimistic in his rose-colored view of the future. I'm so worried that the fit will hit the shan once they're back under Carlisle's roof and thumb.

    Awesome chapter.

  15. I have really been looking forward to this chapter, and you didn't disappoint. I know things aren't going to be all sunshine and rainbows now, but it's definitely looking up. I love sweet Edward. He still has so much to learn, but at least now he's willing. I'm so happy he's keeping the house. I can't wait for him to tell Bella.

  16. I loved the chapter. Well worth the wait. I love the progress with Edward and I really hope Carlisle doesn't get to her. I have a feeling that he is going to work faster to get to her now and I fear that Bella will not have told Edward about him yet.

  17. awesome chapter. he's finally getting it. im proud of him. im just worried about carlisle. i don't think that edwards going to change back as soon as he gets home since he's felt what its like to have bella choose him but i have a feeling carlisle isn't going to appreciate the choices that edwards going to start making.

  18. So glad to have a new chapter! Thank you!
    This one was an interesting look into their heads and their changing relationship. I'm glad Bella chose him freely, but I'm even happier that he would have let her go. That's the biggest change of all for him and I think was what proved to her that he truly loves her, not just the Barbie he created.
    All his progress is so encouraging, but his view of the future has me a bit worried. He's still seeing HIS version of a perfect future for them. I think he's going to be startled and confused when he finds out she's not ready for kids and wants to go to college. It hasn't hit him yet that they can't just go home and pick up life where they left off, with an apology to Esme. Carlisle will now be isolated - not one member of his family is in his corner anymore. But he'll still have power over Esme and the family finances. And he's going to have a major vendetta against Bella when he realizes she's the catalyst for Edward's change. Oh, I can't wait for more, because I have a feeling we're not getting off the roller coaster any time soon!

  19. omg !! shiit i love it!!!!! omg i cant belive it! i have tears in my eyes im soo happy! he is changing for real! awwwwwwwwwwwww

    love your ff! im soo happy you were able to update! thank god! thank you for not giving up on the ff. you rock!

  20. oh by the way if you get DISQ.COM on your blog i think you can get more comments! just follow the direction, its very easy, i know lots of people have DISQ because thats what newmoonmovie use for their comments & it also allow open, twitter, facebook users to comment too

  21. WooHoo! A new chapter! It was great. Like a another poster said Edward's future dream rubbed me kind of wrong - just didn't seem like a equal partnership. The whole engagement and summer wedding also rubbed me wrong - again it was all about his needs. Maybe I am not as forgiving as Bella, but I still think he is being selfish.
    The last paragraph seemed bit omnious to me. Maybe too perfect. Does Edward realize how hard it is going to be living under Carlisle's roof and not fall back into his old habits. Or how hard it might be for Bella for them to pretend. I was glad to see he recognized that she wasn't ready for teasing, but will he realize she might need even more reassurance when they are back home since he is going to have to pretend to be Carlisle's Edward? She is probably going to have a hard time in the beginning determining if it really is an act or if he is falling back into his old ways.

  22. Soo great... I loved it.. So worth the wait. You blow my mind with how in tune you are with the characters. Such a wonderful job. I know he is going to continue to have challenges. Especially when they get home, but I am so happy that they are working toward something.

    How all is going well with the family. It is great to have the story back.

    Love ya,

  23. Awesome updated. I'm so excited about Edward keeping the car and the house. I love that he sent his Mom flowers. Best chapter ever.

  24. Ok so great chapter well worth the wait. Clearly Edward has made some improvements, ok so that is an understatement, but I still see a bit of the old edward lurking beneath the surface, ie the whole expediated wedding and honeymoon. anyway really curious as to what will happen when they get back to washingtion and when B tells E her big secret.

  25. Great chap.. Yay! for 38. Their coming together and learning one another is so relieveing I just loved it. This Edward is so much more human to me it makes me happy to see him this way. I thank Bella for staying and willing to return his affections eventually. The most touching moment for me, was when Jasper relayed the reaction of Esme to Edward's gift for her. How sweet. But I worry what happens when they return to clutches of Carlisle?! Won't they have to act just like Jasper and Emmett do with Rosalie and Alice? You know put on a show? Bella should try to tell Edward about his father's intention towards her before it's too late. Can't wait for more, so glad for this blog.....

  26. Wow... that was freaking Amazing
    i <3 this story

  27. I can not tell you how happy I am this story has a new home!!

    This chapter was excellent and made me smile. I am nervous about Carlisle and how he will react, we all know it WILL be ugly and dangerous. Be strong Edward, you will need all your resolve.

    Love it ;-)

  28. ah.
    mic, i love you!
    i'm so glad to see you're posting again, and that things are back on the line.
    this was AMAZING. like whoa.

    i want Edward to stay like this, but i know not to get my hopes up toooo high.
    ooh. its gonna be drama when they get back. wonder how Carlisle is gonna handle that.

  29. Thank you for a new chapter. I've missed this story so much.
    I'm glad Edward and Bella are getting some type of normalcy going and I'm glad Edward is starting to show Esme that he loves her.
    I don't even wanna know the drama that is gonna come when Carlisle finds out all of this.

    Great chapter!!!!

  30. Thank you soooo much for this chapter! I've been waiting for an update of this story for a while, but I completely understand you having to take your time and overcome everything with FF before you could move forward and I commend you for handling the situation so well. I started reading the story on FF not too long ago and I had just finished Chapter 37 right before they removed the story, so this update has been a long wait for me, but well worth it. I love the evolution both characters have taken, and love that the normalcy and intimacy is growing. I just hope Bella's Edward makes it back to Forks and can beat the hell out of Carlisle's Edward when Carlisle tries to step in!!! Great Chapter!

  31. I'm so happy that Edward is changing and Bella is happier. Great chapter.
    Please make Bella tell Edward about Carlisle, he needs to know!

  32. I'm so nervous about them going home! Thanks for another great chapter! :) RoseArcadia

  33. I absolutely loved this chapter and was so happy that you have updated. I have followed you from FF. I love that Edward is making such great progess and that Bella can see it. I know I may be crazy.. but I would love to see Bella want to give Edward a little "relief" and let him do that for her.. on her own, maybe after he tells her that he is not selling the house.. maybe have her tell him that she loves him... I can see her heart growing for him.. I know it has been a twisted story... but these two are truely made for each other... they do deserve a Happy Ever After... I can't wait to see where you take this story.. love it

  34. Wow, I really loved the chapter.
    But Edward still has a lot to learn! I think he is so overwhelmed by his own transformation and its consequences that he doesn´t realize that not everything is going to be perfect and the way he imagines it!
    I hope you will update soon!!!

  35. Wonderful chapter Mic! I can still see areas of growth needed in Edward aka his dream life is still skewed, but he is getting there and that makes me soooo happpy! Thanks for posting!!!!

  36. This is a great chapter, I love the steps being taken but I am worried that Carlisle will not like what is going on and he will take it out on Bella... How will they be able to keep the changes to themselves?

  37. yay!! I love this chapter too!! It's AWESOME!! I can't wait to read what happens next!

  38. Great Chapter. Please keep this up. The evolution of Edward is really interesting. Just when I think he can't get any better then he does. Bella is beginning to love him back and that is important. It is amazing that Edward has had no doubts about his love for her. Bella is close to accepting that she loves him too.

  39. Great chapter. I loved it and I'm so glad he sent his mother some flowers. I know Esme needed them.

    Loved it :)

  40. aaaww! Great chapter! i´m so glad to be able to read new chapters! i missed them :(
    Alice and Jasper are so cute! i love them alredy!
    They have a long way to go but i love to read the progress Edward is making.
    Hope you can update soon!!!

  41. Yay a TPW update!!!and it seems that everything is going ok for them, now we just have to see what happens when they go back home. Hopefully Carlisle won't ruin all their efforts.

  42. absolutely LOVED LOVED LOOVVVEED the chap.... eds so sweet now n i am glad bella finally realized tht his feelings r genuine.... thanks for updatin i hpe ure hsband is doin better now

  43. I can see Edward still has in his mind that Bella will be home waiting. Bella will be the one taking care of the kids. Bella will be the one cooking everything and fetching the popcorn...but I can also see that he is trying and that makes me uber happy! :]

  44. OMG!!!! First just let me say...I LOVE this chapter. I LOVE this whole story. GREAT JOB!!!

    I want to thank you so much for continueing this story even after ff took it down. I was so worried that we would never know what happened to Bella and Edward. Thank you very much for all your HARD work in posting this story here. I know it had to have taken a lot time and effort to do this. THANK YOU!!!!!

    I love that Bella chose Edward, freely.
    She is starting to love HER Edward.
    There are alot of concerns that I read in the comments here. But they all had to deal with Edward and his "perfect" future with Bella. I am a little concerned with that but Edward is still changing, so I am not as worried with that. What I am concerned with is Bella. She seems to think that she can dress the way she wants after they go back....she is not going to be able to do that. I hope she realizes that. She and Edward will have to pretend in front of Carlisle just like Jasper, Alice, Rose and Emmentt. That is bothering me. I know that pretending will be harder for them than the others because Edward and Bella live with Carlisle. They can't get away from him as easy.

    Will Bella tell Edward about what Carlisle said he was going to do to her??? If she does I don't think Edward could take her back there to live with Carlisle. Plus, I think he would hurt Carlisle. I just don't see that happening. I feel like that Edward will walk in on Carlisle attempting to ass-rape Bella and all but kill him. HaHa!!!! can't wait to find out how you are going to do that. You are the BEST at writing and having us sitting on the edge of our sits.

    I like all of this "happy" stuff but I know when they get back that the drama is going to start. That kind of scares me but if it didn't happen then there would not be much left of the story and I am not ready for it to end. Every GREAT story always has good drama. This story definately has that. GREAT JOB!!!!!

    Thanks again for reposting this story here so your FANS can enjoy. As always GREAT chapter and we can't wait for your next update.

  45. So excited to have a new chapter, and it did not dissapoint! The strides Edward is taking to move past his fathers' indoctrination are wonderful. But as with so many others, I worry about what's going to happen when they return home. Carlisle is going to be pissed! I don't thihk Edward would fully go back to how he was, but its going to be harder to control that side of him.

    Loved his sending flowers to his mothers. Can't wait to read about their reunion. And I'm thrilled that he's shipping the car back and keeping the house.

    Looking forward to the next chapter!

  46. Hooray for a new chapter! Sorry it got taken off of :( After the controversy that happened over Comic-Con though I guess it didn't come as a huge shock. I can't wait to see what comes next though! Edward just seems a little bit too happy-go-lucky. I know you love us but I don't believe you'll leave us w/o a little heart-fail for long! :-P I hope Bella tells Edward about Carlisle soon! That's making me super nervous for her! Keep up the great work hun, can't wait to read the next chapter!

    Loves it! as always,

  47. Wow, I'm so glad he is changing and actually having some self control. I do understand why Bella is holding off about telling him about Carlisle threat but I hope she tells him sooner than later. I also feel like a big storm is coming...I'm excited to read more

    Update soon

  48. I'm so glad you got the story up here! I was so sad when it was taken of fanfiction. I can't wait to read more. I love this storyyy!!! I'm looking forward to another update!

  49. Wow that was a lot of reviews to scroll through. Anyways. I loved it! I am so proud of Edward. He still thinks life is going to be a perfect basket of roses, but Rome wasn't built in a day, change doesn't happen overnight either. I was glad to see that he was not only improving things with Bella but also with his Mom, Esme. They both are more so on the same page with eachother. I was excited for Bella that Edward was going to let her keep the car and the house. The car could be a constant reminder of her parents, but it is a could reminder, it is one of the love they had for her. Okay I just love this story way too much. I can't wait till your next chapter update!

  50. Hey Mic... how's thing up there?
    is ur husband any better...?

    thanks for updating in such a difficult time. the story is amazing and i loved the chapter.

    it's great to see that they're doing alright.. bt i'm still afraid of them at home 'cause liking it or not Ed will have to be an ass cause of Carlisle...

    anyway.. lokking forward for news and new chapters!


  51. I'm glad they had a warm and fuzzy chapter. Edward seems like he is finally getting his shit together and making up for Bella's cruel fate. My fav line has to be: “I stayed because today you would have let me leave.” It's my favorite because it seems to define this chapter and one of the story's turning points.
    I'm glad you to stuck with TPW, even though FF sucks at life sometimes. As always, looking forward to the next chapter.

  52. Seriously, the relationship between Esme and Edward that has been so damaged by Carlisle pains me so much. And when he asked Jasper about the flowers and Esme's response--i totally cried. I'm so nervous for Carlisle, but I'm so happy that Bella can be herself again and Edward is clearly trying really hard and is doing a great job--not only with just her but by giving her the car and keeping the house! Can't wait for the next chapter--loved this one :)

  53. I can't wait for Bella to tell Edward about Carlisle. I think it is great how the story has flourished. You have kept us on pins and needles waiting for the next chapter and I can't wait to see how things play out once they are back in Forks. Will the boys confront Carlisle or will they wait until he is dead to move on? Thanks so much for the update! I know your time is precious and look forward to your next chapter. April

  54. I'm glad that Edward is really trying not with Bella but even his mom. So thoughtful that he is keeping the house and the car, can't wait for Bella's reaction. I hope Bella is able to trust Edward sooner than later so she can tell him about Carlisle. I wonder if Carlisle will notice the difference in Edward when they get back. Definitely looking forward to the next update!!

  55. Loved it and can't wait for more....|Edward is going to kill Carsile once he finds out the threat and I am so glad that Edward is keeping the house!!!!!!

  56. Awwww, he's finally realised he doesn't have to be the Monster his father made him. I can't wait for when they go home. And he sent his mum a Huge bunch of Flowers - he's becoming a normal guy - so sweet!!! Thanks for the update - hope more is in the works soon!!!

  57. Thanks for the update, I am glad that I found it! It is a really beautiful chapter, but still with shit to come, I know. Carlisle is not going to make this easy, and Edward is still a work in progress. We can't expect him to just become the grown up version of the little boy his mother was raising. He has made a good start, but he is certainly not there yet. I hope they can both find a way to be patient with each other, keep building on the trust, and find a way toward the love they both truly want.

  58. I'm so proud of Edward and all the steps forward he has made with both Bella and Esme. He's trying so hard to be Esme & Bella's Edward and leave Carlisle's Edward behind. Carlisle is not going to be happy with any of the decisions that Edward is making and I'm really worried about what he will do. I'm very happy that Bella is starting to trust Edward and even think she could love him. He's changed so much in just a short period, but he's definitely worth the risk. I hope that she follows through with telling about Carlisle's threat. He needs to know what his father was planning to do to the woman he loves. Jasper and Alice are going to be so proud of the changes in him when they actually get to see them. Thanks for the update. Glad you found a new home for the story. I would have missed it very much!

  59. Thank you so much for the new chapter! Awesome! I really do hope that Bella tells Edward about Carlisle threat, I dont think Edward would bring her back to that house if he knew. They should just stay in a hotel or at one of the brothers houses till his is done. Or better yet the three brothers should just jump Carlisle and beat him into submission!! LOl Cannot wait to see what happens!

  60. i love this and i'm happy i found it again. I hope edward doesn't go back and he keeps moving forward

  61. Ecellent chapter. I love that Edward didn't react his "usual" way with Bella, but let her say and do what she wanted - tnat was awesome.

    I'm looking forward to seeing Carisle're raction to all of this...

  62. Wow! This was a great surprise. I was sorry it took me a couple of days to get to it.

    Hahaha I don’t blame her. Even if things are getting better with Edward here in Phoenix, life back in Forks will not be easy!

    He really is coming along. I’m proud of him. I’m still a little uncertain how Bella will get beyond all that he has done to her, but he is becoming a better man. And if we are a little practical about this, it would be a waste for Bella to go through all this trouble of making him wake to the real world and then leave him for another woman to harvest the goods. KWIM? ;)

    I guess she has made up her mind to make this work. :) Cool!
    I don’t know anyone who has gone through anything even close to what she has, but I know a few women who have gone through hell in their own way because of a man and still decided to give them a second chance when they truly showed the intention to makes things right. I know they don’t regret doing it.

    Maybe there is no “sense” to it! It was a gut reaction. She just felt and did. She might never find sense in her actions that moment.

    That is so important and we must not forget this. She is so young. It is “normal” for her to make “irrational” decisions. We all made them at some point. Her stakes are higher, but it does not change the period she is living.

    Kind of what I was going on about before. She has been fighting hard for this. :)

    And after this I do believe that the ideal of love he had for Bella is actually becoming real. Because I did not buy it before. He just loved the idea of her; he didn’t even know her, to love her.

    Good! Because I’m not ready either. If you look at my favorite fic list, you will see that I don’t shy away from the smut, but even with all the change, this, for them, right now, is not right yet. That part will have to be something Edward yet has to earn by making Bella feel the love and feel comfortable enough.

    He will have to learn that he can’t impose control over Bella though her body anymore, and that he has to show and “live” his love for her in new ways.

  63. ...cont
    He really should know by now that Jasper is pretty much always right. ;)

    That he should. Unfortunately, there was no responsible adult around to do it, just his insane father!

    I’m ecstatic he finally realizes this. :)

    I don’t know what that is referencing to. Could you explain?

    I hope he understands that there are many ways to have that connection with non-sexual gestures.

    That all sounds a little too 50’s Americana to my ears. I’m not sure this is the future Bella is dreaming of. I can imagine she might want children one day, but being this housewife just taking care of the family might not be what she wants...

    Hahahahh I loved the little reference to the books there. :)

    This is making me happy. I appreciate that he still wants the things he is used to, but he is willing to fight the urges. I’m sure this will pay off in the end for him. ;)

    Well, don’t leave it till it is too late! :P

    I guess better late than never applies. But he owes her big, huge even!

    No, no, no! This is not the right reason to do things! Tell him to relive teenage years and just relief himself. :P

    OMG!!! I almost forgive for wanting to expedite the wedding so he can get laid! LOL

    That is why I believe in not beating around the bush when it comes to sharing feelings. :) do it now, while you have the chance.

    And Bella was going to love me and we’d have a wonderful life and marriage.
    He has to realize it won’t be just that easy. And this wonderful life and marriage need s Bella’s input too. He shouldn’t be dreaming alone.

    :) So I’m glad they had this extra time in Phoenix. :D I don’t care if it took more chapters than you wanted, it is still fantastic. :)

  64. Yay! Thank you so much for the update. You made my day, cause I was having a pretty crappy one up to this point. I am so proud of our little Eddie now that he's growing out of Dickward and becoming a man! :-D

  65. This chapter was well worth the wait. I cried when Edward told Jasper that he wanted to have Bella's car shipped so she could keep it and that he was not going to sell the house. It seems like he is finally realizing the wrongs that have been ingrained in his head by his father. I am a little nervous about what will happen when Bella tells Edward about Carlisle, or maybe he will see something first hand. I can't wait to see what happens next!

  66. amazing chapter!!! im so happy edward'd changing for the better =)update asap!!!

  67. I'm so glad I found you! I missed this story. Great chapter!

  68. amazing chapter! so glad you are able to continue this, even off ff.n!

  69. YAY love this story!!
    im so glad you are continuing it!!
    i was so surprised, the house and the car? WOW
    im glad we are finally seeing Esme's still wondering about what he did to Esme to gain his father's love...i think i may have just forgotten =( and i caught the debate Bella had about telling Edward about carlisle

  70. I'm so happy right now I'm literally clapping! Thanks for continuing this story. Seriously!

  71. Really amazing
    wish i could read the note in the flower that Edward send to Esme

    thank you for keeping updating : )

  72. thanks for updating this story,i cant wait to see what will happen when they go back to forks.

  73. I have waited soooo long for this update....and i m glad to say that the wait was soooo worth it... Great Chap...

  74. This is so intense, but this chapter saw thatEdward can change... I am very glad...
    I was so happy to see this update, I squealed...
    Keep up the good work!!!
    I hope that Bella tells Edward about his dad soon...

  75. OMFG!!! Im dying here!!! I want to know what was gonna happen to both of them when they got back home... Carlisle is a pain in the ass....

  76. Amazing! The last chapters where great. I didn't like the first chapters so much, because in my opinion they were written a little bit to...the right german word would be "knapp" and I don't know which is the right english term to describe my opinion...maybe lean? ^^ What I want so say - there happened to much without a description of Bellas feelings and thoughts. But that changed and now I'm really happy that I didn't stop reading.
    I hope you understand my comment, my english isn't the best. I started with the german translation (by the way, the translation is pretty good, maybe a little bit literally) but I couldn't wait for new chapters so I continued with the original story. ;)
    Greetz from Germany,

  77. I am so glad that Edward is finally figuring it all out! I cant wait to see what happens in the morning!!


  78. SO good... I like it when you include little snippets with Jasper and Alice. To tell the truth, I think this story contains my favourite version of Jasper; he has depth and character development in this story compared to, lets say Twilight, where he's a bit of a background blugh character.

    [I would just like to state for the record that I'm not actually Team Jasper. I'm TEAM EMMETT! Because Emmett is clearly the shizz!]

  79. I never thought I would get a warm fuzzy feeling from this story but I did... I'm so glad this is up and going again.

  80. Another amazing chapter my friend. I hope you and your family are doing well.

  81. Well I'll be damned. Esme's Edward is coming to life! I'm so proud of him! I cannot wait to read how this is going to play out, girl!

  82. I was so excited when I saw the update, great chapter! They are making so much progress! Edward still has some pretty convoluted/presumptous ideas (ie assuming that Bella if she wants to be a stay home mom, and doesn't college and career ambitions) about how their marriage will be, but he's opened the lines of communication, so it can only get better! Has Bella not given any thought to the fact that she will still have to play the roll in front of Carlisle for atleast a little while longer? (maybe throwing out all her Barbie clothes isn't the best idea...) lol

  83. OK, it's been 16 days since the update....are we getting another one soon...PLEASE??? Hanging onto the cliff here waiting patiently for the update, but the fingers are getting very tired from holding on...Don't let me fall...please update again soon!!! LMAO

  84. So many positive things for Bella and Edward.
    I hope that Bella tells Edward about Carlisle. She is becoming so hopeful about her and Edward's relationship. Bella is falling for 'MyEdward'. I hop that he will continue to show restraint and follow his heart. He is a good man inside (Bella sees that now), he just needs to bring it to the surface and be strong enough when it comes to his past and Carlisle. I loved seeing how Edward is listening to Bella and trying to please her. I love that he sent Esme flowers! I can't imagine how Esme must feel knowing that her son is coming back to her. Thank you for writing! marijee

  85. I'm so happy for this chapter! I hope Edward can keep this up when he gets home and stand up to Carlisle. Your writing is so wonderful, and I am so happy that you are continuing this story!

  86. OMR, this chapter was really amazing. They will keep the house in Phoenix, that's great, and Bella's car too. I hope that Edward and Bella's life could be good near Carlisle too. He is still a danger for Bella. You makes a very good job, thank you for sharing !

  87. They are on such a great path. I certainly hope Edward continues to grow and realize how wrong it was before and makes it up to Bella. Great chapter!!

  88. Great chapter! I'm so proud of Edward, making good decisions all on his own. He had such big realizations about his father and his relationship with his mother. I'd love to know what the note says to Esme. She deserves so much, having basically sacrificed her life for her boys. Yay for Edward and Bella.

  89. "I wanted Christmas mornings around a big tree. I wanted to play Santa for our children like Bella told me Phil did for her. I wanted to see her belly swollen with a child, with a couple of little munchkins running around at her feet. She’d be tired at the end of the day from taking care of our children and home. When I came home from the hospital at night, she’d be glad to see me, her eyes filled with love for me. I’d kiss her lips and her belly, telling her how much I loved her. Our children would run to me and I’d take them outside to toss a ball while Bella finished our dinner. I wanted to have picnics in our living room at night, everyone loving and laughing while Bella made popcorn for us to eat. I wanted this life with Bella."
    Hmm... sounds like Bella's Edward is still a little confused about what it means to have an independent wife. Why does he assume she wants a ton of kids and wants to stay at home all day and make dinner when he gets home? Maybe she wants to go out, maybe she wants him to cook because she has to study for her Masters after a long day of work-study. MAYBE she doesn't want any freakin kids! MAYBE she wants Edward to be a stay-at-home husband! MAYBE he should be a little more considerate when imagining their future!!! Argh! I guess Edward still has a lot of ingrained beliefs and notions about the way a happy family should function. I hope he starts to appreciate the complexity of a modern family and what it means to live in the 21st century. It also seems this reader is still pissed at Carlisle's Edward's behavior and expects him to change over night...

    "I’d need to stop at Mr. McGee’s shop the week we get home so I can pick up Bella’s ring. It was time to make us official. I thought a summer wedding would be best. There was no way I could wait for a Christmas wedding now. I was going to spontaneously combust if I didn’t get to relieve my physical needs soon and I’d only gone without for two days."
    Pretty much same as above but even worse. What the heck makes him think she's going to want to marry him right away? Didn't she explain that she wasn't sure what would happen but that she was willing to give it a TRY?!?!! And who-the-fuck does he think he is DECIDING when their wedding will be?! and seriously, could he get much more self-centered in his thoughts? Ick!!!

    "I would love to know if he loved my mother at all, and if so, how he could possibly think everything he did to her was okay."
    I want to know too!!! That would be so awesome, a one-shot or a back-story within TPW explaining a little about Carlisle and what made him the monster he is today. You're a genius at writing emotions and explaining subconscious thought processes so I know whatever you come up with will be amazing. *wink, wink*

    "I’m not selling the house ... I just decided tonight."
    Argh! When is he going to understand that it's not HIS decision to make, it's Bella's because it's HER house?!?!!

    Great chapter! I'm sure you can tell from my review that it ...moved... me. You did a great job showing Edward's struggles and that his entire outlook on the concept of marriage, and women in general, needs to be relearned.

    Thank you!

  90. Wow! I had almost given up on the thought of this story being updated again ^.^

    It is magnificent and can't wait for the next chapter!

  91. It is sooooo goood !
    please don`t stop updating : D

  92. This chapter is such a turning point for Edward and Bella. I'm just concerned about the wrath of Carlisle when he realizes that Edward - his Edward - has strayed from his control.

  93. What a beautiful chapter!!

    The best section was Edward sending the flowers to him Mum!!!

    How touching!! I would of never thought that he would realize that him changing for Bella coincides with him changing for Esme!

    Growth, Growth and more Growth!! Love it!!

  94. heather leigh voiced all my frustrations already, so I won't say them. I will say, though, that while old Edward is still there, it is so nice to see new Edward work so hard to lock the old one away. I know he's going to make mistakes still, but Bella feeling strong enough to yell at him will make things right.

    I also loved that he sent flowers to his mom. I think Carlisle is going to have problems when they get home.

  95. Edward still has alot to learn. The fact that he has her basically barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen says he still thinks like a caveman. Bella is obviously very bright. She may want a career for herself. Especially if they can get out from underneath of Calisle's thumb.

    I think it was very sweet of Edward to send Esme flowers. I can't wait to see their relationship develop. I would love to know what punishment he came up with for Esme to endure.

    Keeping the car and the house is progress. Hope he keeps it up.

  96. I loved this chapter. I remember reading this story on fanfiction, then it was gone. I totally love this story. I like how they are starting to develop a real relationship. I'm glad that Edward took Jasper's advice. I hope Bella tells him about Carlisle's threat. I would hate to see him hurt her. I'm glad I can finish reading this story.