Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Chapter 40


I tossed aside the wilted and dying bundle of flowers as I laid my bouquet of red roses on the grave. I stared at the tombstone of the woman I’d loved for so many years. I hated the picture on the stone; her face filled with joy and love for a man that should have been me.

I didn’t bother to turn around as I heard footsteps crunch on the gravel path toward me.

“I still can’t believe she’s gone. If I’d only claimed her back in school, she’d still be here with me,” I told the person next to me. “Bella would have been my daughter. I would have spoiled them both rotten. Renee would have been my queen and Bella, I would have raised as a princess,” I said bitterly. He waited silently for me to continue. “How did it go?”

“Their trip went well. There was only one scare early on, but Edward caught her before I had to reveal myself,” he said.

“Damn it! I told that boy to keep a close eye on her. Did she see you?” I asked.

“No, she didn’t. I know how to blend into the background and she never has been that observant.” He smirked, “I could have been right behind her and she wouldn’t notice.” He shrugged, “and Edward has never met me.”

“What about at the house? I know that old lady next door is a world class busybody. Did she see you? You’re supposed to be in China after all,” I said, turning to Embry.

“I rented a dark sedan and fortunately they only went to the house a couple of times.” He chuckled. “They spent most of their time at the hotel or sightseeing around Phoenix. You’d be proud though, if you heard how Edward told off that old biddy when they met. She definitely had him pegged. She never did like me much. In ten years I couldn’t convince her.”

“You’ve done well. Head home. I have a flight to catch. I need to arrive at the conference before Edward gets there. He can’t know I made a stop along the way. I’m not ready to reveal everything to him yet.”

He shook my hand and followed me back to where the cars were waiting. I left for the airport, dreaming again of what could never be. I’d never have the woman I loved, but I would have her daughter to take her place.


I yelled ‘bye’ to my friends as I got into Emmett’s jeep. I was surprised to see Rose was with him.

“Hey Rose. I thought the doctor told you to stay off your feet a little longer,” I asked.

She found out while we were gone that her pregnancy was going well, but to be safe the doctor wanted her on bed rest for another few weeks. Emmett was beside himself when the sonogram showed they were having a boy.

“Don’t you start too. I can’t help it. The baby wants a chili dog and a chocolate milkshake,” Rose grumbled. She shuddered. “I hate hot dogs. They have chicken lips in them.”

Emmett reached over and rubbed her swollen belly. “I’m gonna have to have another talk with my son. He’s upsetting his mother again.” Emmett tried to console her. “But baby, I don’t think chickens have lips. They’re called beaks and I don’t think they really put them in hot dogs.”

Rose glared at him from her seat and slapped his hand away. “You. You don’t talk to me. You did this to me. Your son is just mean and wants to torture me with his disgusting food preferences.”

“Rosie, baby, please don’t be mad at me or our son. I’m taking you to eat your chili dog aren’t I? Did you want something else? Do you want ice cream? We can go anywhere you want. I’m sure Bella doesn’t mind not going home yet.” He glanced back at me. “Do you, Bella?”

“No I don’t mind. Edward won’t be home for another couple of hours. I’d love a chili dog.”

Rose started crying. “I knew it. You think I’m fat, don’t you?”

Emmett glanced back at me in the rearview mirror. I was trying so hard not to laugh at the exasperated expression on his face. Lately he just couldn’t win with Rose. No matter what he did or said he was wrong.

It was amazing the changes taking place in him. He was so sweet to her and did everything in his power to keep her comfortable and happy. Rosalie was still afraid of how Emmett would want to raise their son. Emmett was changing and becoming a better man, but four years of marriage and how they started had left their mark and she was still afraid.

“Rosalie Cullen,” he stated firmly, “you know I think you’re the most beautiful woman on earth. I could never think you’re fat. You’re carrying my son. If anything that makes you even more beautiful to me. You know I love you. You’ll feel a lot better once you get your milkshake and hot dog.”

Rose reached to pull his hand up to kiss, then turned in her seat to look at me. She smiled at me and sighed. “Isn’t he just wonderful?” she breathed.

I smiled and agreed with her. Emmett had certainly changed for the better. Seeing her eyes shining with love for Emmett reminded me how much I loved and missed Edward. I couldn’t wait to see him this evening.

Our room was lonely at night without him there. Esme and I took full advantage of this time without Carlisle in the house. We stayed up late eating ice cream in the family room and talking or watching sitcoms on TV. Just controlling the remote control was a luxury. We laughed, tossing the remote between us to switch channels.

Esme taught me how to make Edward’s favorite cookies, oatmeal raisin pecan. We even had them for dinner with large glasses of milk. We talked more about our life and expectations when I expressed my surprise that Carlisle would leave us alone to go to a conference.

“Esme,” I started hesitantly, “wouldn’t this be the perfect time for you to leave? While he’s out of town he can’t stop you?”

She shook her head at me. “Bella, you’re forgetting one important fact. The gate is guarded. He made sure I did my shopping early so there would be no reason for me to leave the grounds while he’s gone.”

“But wouldn’t Emmett or Jasper help you leave if you wanted?” I asked. I just wanted her to get away from Carlisle. She deserved to find some kind of peace in life.

“Bella sweetheart, you’re young and still so naïve. From the first moment I found out I was pregnant with Emmett, I knew I could never leave. Carlisle would never let me take my son and I would never leave without him. Now,” she stroked my head and smiled at me. “Now, I have another beautiful daughter; the daughter of my very best friend no less, and a grandson on the way. I like to think that my staying helped teach my sons how to love even if they all forgot for a while.”

“But you could be happy,” I stressed. “Alice has Jasper. Rose has Emmett and I even have my Edward now. Besides all of us, what do you have?”

She laughed softly to me and stood walking over to the family room window that overlooked her garden. It was night so there was only the soft illumination of the full moon; her reflection like a mirror in the window pane. I was surprised at the expression reflected back to me. Her gaze was full of love as she stared out into the darkness.

“Bella, I have my children and my garden. It may not seem possible to you, but I am happy. Would I be happier if Carlisle fell off the face of the earth or decided one day to let me go with no repercussions? Of course.”

She turned back to me, her expression fierce. “No one knows better than I the monster I married. You can’t begin to imagine the horrors that man has put me through, put my children through while teaching them how to be men.” She made air quotes with her fingers at the word ‘men’. “But I’ve made my peace with life. I’ve learned what it takes to survive and along the way I found a way to be happy.” Her voice cracked at the end.

“Esme, I’m sorry.” I ran to her wrapping my arms around her to comfort her. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I love you and I just wanted to help.”

I wanted to change the subject because it was obvious our current conversation was upsetting her. I realized again she brought up her garden. I had to ask.

“Esme, what’s the secret to your garden? You always say it makes you happy but there has to be more to it than just growing flowers.”

She shook her head at me. “Not now. You don’t need my secret. You have Edward now.” She smiled brightly at me. “And so do I. I have my baby back finally, thanks to you. Now why don’t we put some of these cookies in a container you can hide in your room as a surprise when he gets home tomorrow?”

I laughed and agreed with her, effectively ending our serious talk.


The only downside to my time apart from Edward was my nightmares were back. Last night had been so vivid it woke me up in the middle of the night. I hated nights that I dreamed of Carlisle. I hated that Edward wasn’t there to hold me through them. I felt silly, but I had to tuck his pillow against my back to fake myself out that he was curled against me in my sleep.

I’d spent the last couple of days arguing with everyone but Esme. The arguments fed my insecurities and brought back my nightmares. Jasper and Alice had told me I needed to go back to wearing my ‘normal’ clothes when Edward and Carlisle got back. They told me not to forget myself around him and that I would need to continue to pretend until Jasper, Emmett and Edward could talk about how to unite against him. I got angry and yelled at Jasper, shocking everyone into silence.

“I will not be Bella Barbie!” I yelled. “Drop it!”

Everyone stared at me in disbelief. I’d never raised my voice to Jasper or Emmett.

“Bella, we’re only trying to help,” Jasper assured me.

I shook my head at him and started crying. I couldn’t do it and I didn’t have to. They couldn’t make me. “You don’t understand,” I stressed. “Edward promised me. I don’t have to pretend anymore!” My voice got steadily louder again.

“Bella. That’s enough,” Emmett admonished. “No one is attacking you. All Jasper is saying is to wait until Edward and you have a moment alone to talk.”

“You’ll see. Edward doesn’t want me to act like that anymore. He said I could be myself.”

I prayed I was right. I guess time would tell.


I stood in the kitchen fixing dinner for Edward’s homecoming. He called from the airport and told me he’d be home soon. I wasn’t very hungry after eating my chili dog but I knew he would be. Edward didn’t like airline food. I wanted our reunion to be perfect. I also wanted to prove to everyone that he didn’t expect me to pretend any longer which is why I was in jeans, a t-shirt and barefoot. I trusted Edward to keep his promise.

I screamed as I felt arms slip around my waist. I spun around to my Edward’s laughing face.

“Did I scare you?” He laughed.

“You’re home!” I squealed.

I jumped into his arms wrapping my legs around his waist. He quickly caught me and moved me away from the stove to sit me on the counter. Our lips connected instantly in a heated kiss born of longing and need. I raked my fingers through his hair and moaned into his mouth as he pulled me to the edge of the counter so I was pressed tight against his waist. Our lips finally broke apart so we could catch our breaths and I cupped his cheeks in my hands. I preceded to rain kisses all over his face much to Edward’s amusement.

“I…take…it you…missed…me,” he stated between kisses.

I giggled at him and wrapped my arms around his shoulders, hugging him close.

“Of course I missed you, silly.” I responded lightly. I’ve spent the last few days thinking about how much I was falling in love with Edward. Knowing this and not being with him was hard. I just needed to be near him.

“What the hell is going on in here?” a harsh voice demanded.

I looked over Edward’s shoulder as he turned to see Carlisle and Esme standing in the doorway. I glanced at Esme to see a wistful smile on her face as she looked at Edward. Carlisle’s face was full of disgust. He pointed an accusing finger at me.

“You will clean this entire kitchen and disinfect it. Food is prepared in this room. Edward, take her to your room if you need a release. I don’t want to see that in here ever,” he sneered.

I was surprised when Edward shrugged his shoulders at Carlisle.

“As you wish,” he responded nonchalantly. He then scooped me up from the counter causing me to squeal again. He walked to the doorway carrying me to where Carlisle and Esme were standing and leaned to kiss her on the cheek. “Hello mother.” He then turned to Carlisle, “If you’ll excuse us. I’m taking you up on your advice. We’ll be in our room.”

Carlisle stepped aside stunned into silence as Edward carried me down the hall to the staircase. Edward carried me up the stairs and to our room.

“Care to do the honors?” he said as we got to our room.

I reached down and turned the knob, pushing the door open for him. He kicked the door shut behind him and carried me to our bedroom. He tossed me onto the bed and lay down on top of me.

“Now where were we before we were so rudely interrupted?” he breathed against my lips.

“Mmm, I don’t know. Why don’t you remind me,” I whispered back just has Edward brushed his lips with mine.

He was trying to be sweet, but I wasn’t having that. I missed him too much with my newfound knowledge of love. I raked my fingers through his hair and pulled his lips closer to mine. He moaned as our tongues collided, our kiss becoming more impassioned.

“God I missed you,” he groaned breaking our kiss.

“I missed you too,” I whispered in return. I saw the tiredness in his eyes and decided to do something about it.

“Let me up a minute,” I asked.

He stared down at me in worry. “What’s wrong?” he asked as he moved away from me.

I leaned over him and kissed his nose smiling.

“Nothing,” I grinned. “Roll over.”

“Why?” he asked suspiciously, quirking his eyebrow at me. I could see the smile playing at the corner of his mouth.

I put my fists on my hips and pouted. “Just do it,” I huffed.

He rolled over onto his stomach and pulled the pillow into his chest curling his arms around it. I hiked one leg over his waist so I was straddling him and sat down. I massaged his back in long soothing strokes. Edward groaned in appreciation so I increased the pressure of my strokes earning even deeper groans.

“God, Bella. You have no idea how good that feels,” he moaned.

I smiled knowing I was making him feel good and I wasn’t doing anything I didn’t want to. After a few moments I started feeling a little playful, so I started writing words on his back. I wrote “Bella loves Edward” before he caught onto what I was doing.

“Are you writing on me?” he demanded playfully. He rose up to look at me over his shoulder.

I put on my innocent face.

“Who me?” I grinned.

He caught me off guard by quickly rolling over, effectively pinning me beneath him. I screamed as he began to tickle my sides. He continued to tickle me as I screamed until I was breathless.

He relented long enough for me to catch my breath as I stared into his eyes. I held his gaze as my hands moved to stroke his face and the hair hanging in his eyes. For the first time I recognized the look in his eyes. It was the same look I’d been seeing in the mirror the last few days. Edward loved me. He wasn’t seeing Bella Barbie, he was seeing me. And he loved me! I was safe with him and always would be. I loved him and he loved me. I would tell him soon about his father. I didn’t want to break the mood right now. I was surrounded in love and I wanted to stay buried safe in my cocoon a little while longer.

He lowered his face to mine so our lips barely touched and whispered, “I love you, Bella.”

Before I could utter any type of response our lips fused in a heated kiss. After several moments his lips covered my eyelids and then the corner of my mouth before trailing my jaw down my neck to that sensitive spot that only he knew at the juncture of my throat and shoulder. He tugged the neck of my t-shirt to the side to give him more access but couldn’t get where he wanted to be. He rose up and looked at me, his silent question in his eyes.

I smiled gently and nodded. His lips crashed with mine again as I felt his hand at the hem of my shirt. He gently raised it, breaking our kiss only long enough to get it over my head before tossing my shirt on the floor. My bra quickly followed. Edward stared down at me his eyes darkening to a deep forest green at the sight of me. He slowly lowered his mouth to my aching flesh. I needed him so badly. I wanted everything but knew it would be a mistake this soon.

He gently suckled my breast while his fingers stroked and tweaked my other nipple. He rose up and blew on my wet nipple causing it to pebble even harder under his attention. My fingers left his hair to stroke along his shoulders. I waited what seemed an eternity while he continued to tease me. He would stroke my nipple with his tongue before blowing his breath on it to cause it to pucker before moving to the other to do the same. I was moaning and arching my back trying to show him I wanted more. He was driving me crazy until I couldn’t take it any longer. When he came down to my breast again I grabbed his head and held him there.

“Please,” I whispered.

I felt more than heard his chuckle against my breast.

“Do you want something?” he asked.

“Please don’t tease,” I begged.

His response was to suckle my breast deeply into his mouth, gently biting my nipple. He lathed attention to my breasts as I became more heated with need. I knew where everything was leading and struggled with myself. I was torn between want and need. I needed Edward. I needed him to make love to me. My body was crying out for his. I needed the security of knowing I was safe from Carlisle before I could give herself to him completely. I whimpered when I felt his hand undo the button of my jeans. I was so torn, because I knew it wouldn’t be pleasant denying him after I allowed him to get this worked up, but there was nothing for it. I had to stop him. I moved to stay his hand from my zipper with my own and felt him tense.

“Edward, stop. Please,” I whispered. I was afraid of his response.

I was shocked when his only response was to roll off of me and throw his arm over his face. I couldn’t see his eyes, but I heard his jagged breath. My eyes traveled down to the heavy rise and fall of his chest and smooth abdomen. My eyes traveled further unbidden and could see the bulge that spoke what our activity was doing to him.

I was so torn in that moment. I wasn’t ready to resume everything we had done before, but I wanted to give him something, anything to show him I loved him and appreciated how patient he was being with me. I just didn’t know what. What could I give him that would be something just for him but wouldn’t require me doing ‘that’. I smiled as I finally had my answer. Edward’s breathing was slowing down so I sat up on my knees.

The shift in the mattress alerted him to my movement. He moved his arm staring at me in confusion.

“What’s wrong Bella?” he asked.

“Nothing. Close your eyes,” I replied.

I pulled his shirt up and kissed his chest causing him to suck in his breath.

“Bella, don’t,” he whispered. “I can’t promise I’ll be able to stop.”

“Let me do this for you,” I asked.

It felt so different this time. I was asking because it was what I wanted to do. I wasn’t being manipulated or forced to pretend. I wanted to make him happy. I unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, his erection standing out proudly within his boxers. I slipped my hand inside his boxers and stroked his penis as I resumed kissing his neck and chest. I gently bit his nipples causing him to moan as I continued to stroke him, playing with the slit and using the precum on the tip to lube my hand.

“God, Baby that feels so good,” he groaned.

I smiled that I was doing this to him. I was making him feel good on my terms, which was making me happy in return. This was what my mother always tried to get me to understand when talking about sex and relationships. This is what had been lacking in our intimacy before. Love. True love is what was missing. The fact that I loved Edward is why this time was different. I realized this was on my terms whatever I chose to do in this moment. He wasn’t manipulating me or forcing me. In fact, one arm was fisted in the sheets and the hand stroking my back wasn’t pulling me down to him. He really was leaving all of this up to me.

I leaned up and kissed him deeply again. When our lips broke apart, he stared up at me with smoldering eyes and I smiled at him trying to show him the love I couldn’t yet say.

“Close your eyes and just feel,” I softly ordered.

He groaned but closed his eyes. I sat up and stared at his massive erection that I was stroking, precum leaking steadily from the tip. I clenched my teeth in determination. I was going to do this on my terms. I felt empowered as I lowered my lips to the tip of his penis. I engulfed the tip as I heard Edward’s sharp intake of breath.

“Bella, no, don’t,” he groaned. “You don’t have to do this. I know you don’t like it.”

I smirked as I took him deeper into my mouth. His mouth told me ‘no’, but the hand gently stroking my hair told me ‘yes’. I sucked him down as far as I could, relaxing my throat to take him deeper. As I came back up I kissed the tip and then kissed and sucked down the sides before taking him back into my mouth. I continued to bob up and down as I stroked his balls, gently squeezing and pulling on them. When I felt him begin to twitch in my mouth, I rose up and resumed pumping him with my fist until he came all over my hand and his stomach. Edward voiced his release by shouting my name.

He opened his eyes to me. They shone with love and gratitude. He’d liked the release I’d given him, even if I didn’t swallow his semen. I smiled shyly back at him. He pulled me gently to lay with him again.

“Bella, that was more than I ever expected. Thank you.” He tilted my chin to look up at him. “You do know you didn’t have to do that though right?”

I smiled at him and answered softly, “I know. It was my choice. I wanted to make you feel good.”

“Well,” he started, looking down at the mess on his stomach. “I guess I need a shower now,” he laughed.

I sat up with him and watched as he left the bed and headed toward the bathroom. I smiled at his gorgeous back and ass. I couldn’t resist as I climbed out of the bed.

“Want company?” I asked.

He laughed and held out a hand to me. “Always, if it’s you.”


After our shower we headed downstairs. I figured Esme and Carlisle would have already eaten as it was after his strict meal schedule.

“You do know your dinner is ruined now,” I reminded him as we walked into the kitchen. “I'll have to find us something else to eat.”

The kitchen was clean but when I looked in the oven there were two plates covered in foil. I smiled at Esme’s thoughtfulness.

“Never mind. It looks like Esme took care of us,” I told him.

“Remind me to thank her later,” he stated. “Why don’t you put the plates on the table and I’ll grab some glasses.”

I grabbed two mitts and pulled the plates out setting them on the table as Edward poured two glasses of tea. He held out my chair for me and I kissed his cheek in thanks.

“Thank you,” I said.

“You’re welcome,” he answered.

I smiled as I looked down to place my napkin in my lap. He’d remembered. He treated me like a lady.


  1. aaawww!! i loved this one! it was almost all fluff! makes me happy :) it´s rare for these two so it´s apreciated :)
    GREAT GREAT CHAPTER ! as always!!

  2. it was so sweet of edward to be so gentle to bella...
    and this chapture was amazing but i don't really understand
    the beginning. want you to say that carlisle fell in love with reneé?
    thank you for posting this amazing story..

  3. Ok…. Part 1 CPOV: I KNEW that arsehole had them followed. Esp considering he has them followed in town, why not out of town. Hmmm Embry mentioned a scare early on, but not the interaction with the cop…. Maybe he didn’t stick around that long???

    That last comment he make scares the bejeebeeze out of me though. Is he going to do something to Esme and try to claim Bella as his own still? Gawd I hope not. Bella REALLY needs to tell someone about what Carlisle has planned for her, or at least what she thinks.

    Part 2 BPOV: Well can you blame Rose on worrying on how any kid will be raised. God knows what Carlisle’s input will try to be. Esme: I’m still thinking that she has some kind of blackmail material in that garden just in case Carlisle threatens one of the boys. She’s not concerned for herself so much.

    “You’ll see. Edward doesn’t want me to act like that anymore. He said I could be myself.” Bella is naïve if she doesn’t think she’ll have to act around Carlisle.

    After Eddie’s return. Carlisle is sooooo going to take things out on Esme and Bella when Ed is not around. Shrugging his shoulders and calling Esme Mother. I hope Bella follows through on her thought about telling E about C.
    I was going to be upset with her about working him up and leaving him hanging but at least she did something for him. And I’m impressed he stopped when she told him too.

    Wondering if C is lingering in the background watching their dinner interaction though…..

  4. Holy cow! CPOV....that's a totally holy shit. I new Embry was a plant in A Mothers Love, because of Jake and Sam in earlier chapters. So that also means we know that Carlisle had something to do with Bella not going to her aunt and uncle. I can't believe that Carlisle loved Renee... it throws a whole new spin on things.
    I think Bella not acting like Bella Barbie will effect Esme, Edward and Bella the most. I was so excited to see Edward being outwardly affectionate with both Bella and Esme. I thought your mini lemon was sweet. I really can't wait for these updates. Mic, your my hero!

  5. I had a real bad feeling about Embry...I just can't figure out how he fits into everything. How did the will get changed and how Carlisle found them and him. I hope that Esme doesn't suffer for Edward's behavior upon their return, Lord knows that Carlisle is a twisted bastard. I have high hopes that Esme is growing Belladonna in her garden.

  6. I absolutely loved this chapter... I can't believe that Carlisle was in love with Renee...I'm so happy that when Edward got back home that he didn't care what Carlisle thought, he was going to be with Bella on his terms.. and she was great in realizing that he wasn't pushing her and so she wanted to do something for him.. so sweet. I can't wait until she tells him that she loves him.. I have a sneeky feeling that when she does tell Edward about Carlisle's threat, that he will flip out. He will never allow Carlisle to have his was with Bella.. Mic, i know RL is crazy for you.. but this story is so addictive.. please don't make us wait another month for an update..

  7. OMG!!!!!!!

    Carlisle was in love with Renee. I wondered why he would get soooo upset that Charlie would never share Renee.

    He had them followed. Did Embry follow them the whole time? He did not say any thing about how Edward was letting Bella act during their visit at the end.

    I was surprised that Edward was so causal with Carlisle. WHAT REALLY surprised me was that Carilsile did not stop Edward from taking Bella upstairs and having an arguement with Edward right then. Carlisle just seemed to let it drop.

    I am glad that Edward seems to be keeping his promise to Bella, so far. I still believe that thye have many many hard times to come. Can't wait to see what you have planned for them and how they will handle it.

    LOVE THIS STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. I knew Embry was a spy! I hope he didn't have a hand in Renee and Phil's death. Carlisle confused me though with this thoughts on Renee and Bella. If he loved Renee so much, why would he want Charlie to beat her? And why put Bella through all the horrors she went through when he would have treated her as a princess had she been his daughter? Revenge? I can't wait to learn more about this.

    I loved that E was so affectionate with B when he returned. And he obviously didn't mind her clothing choice. I wonder what Carlisle will say about it.

  9. I love this chapter. It's so sweet.
    CPOV was a bit fuzzy to me. But after reading twilightobessions comment it was clear.
    BPOV was totally amazing. Keep up the good work!

  10. I check every day for updates, so thank you thank you thank you! haha.

    I love this chapter, great fluff, just what was needed now in their relationship. The whole CPOV was pretty obvious to me, but interesting to read none the less. I love how Edward is acting now... I was nervous at first when he just shrugged, it almost seemed like he was going to be passive about C's demands.

    I can't wait for Bella to tell Edward about her new found feelings and for Edward to find out about C. I keep thinking he is going to have to save her from a sexual situation with C and next thing you know E kills C and Esme plants him in the garden. That would be the best garden ever! haha.

    Please don't take so long to update again, my fragile heart can't take the suspense of waiting. ;)

  11. OMG! I'm so scared to know what Carlisle is gonna do to Edward. I think for any of them to be safe or happy, that Carlisle will have to die. I just wonder if it will be one of the boys or Esme that finally does the deed.

    I loved B&E so happy and in love. That was totally greatness.

  12. OMG embry the spy..... w00t yea! they're home and E is treating B like a lady! but i'm afraid this is going to be short lived carlisle isn't going to allow this behavior to continue...dun dun dun dun....

  13. Thank you for the great chapter

  14. Loved this chapter! I did not think I could hate Carlisle anymore, but I do. I do Love Edward a lot more though! I understand that Bella does not wanna pretend anymore, but there is something to picking your battles. It my be smart to play along just to get out of there.

  15. I am so unbelievably sad for Esme. I'm so glad that her kids are getting themselves together. Carlisle needs to die, and Edward and Bella need to watch themselves around him. They aren't being really smart. Loved the chapter. It was nice to see Bella happy.

  16. two words: Chicken Lips!!!
    I love when this story updates..at first I thought CPOV was Charlie....but then after a bit I freaked out!!! I love that Edward forund empowerment in telling Carlisle off, well almost!!!! BPOV was amazing and I really hope the boys unite before Carlisle attacks...or maybe they will because of it....but they stop it before it goes to far....

  17. I thought Carlisle was in love with Renee. I am trying to figure out why Embry didn't tell Carlisle the whole story of what happened in Phoenix or if he just didn't hang around long enough. I don't think Carlisle would have treated Bella like a princess at all. He probably would have done the same thing he is doing now. He is a sick, sick man, but karma will come back and bite him in the ass.
    Bella needs to tell Edward about Carlisle soon because I have a feeling something is going to happen. Carlisle would not have just let what happened in the kitchen go. He has to be watching them or something. Please don't wait so long to update...I am dying to see what happens next!!

  18. First of all, I ADORE Edward in this chapter. He has come so far, and I'm so happy to see Bella need him physically. She is starting to heal. Second of all - Carlisle! Holy crap! So he was in love with Renee... the last line of his POV makes me wonder, is he planning on taking Bella from Edward? Not only is he a creepy perv, he's an obsessed creepy perv. So interesting to see his POV, but man is he dangerous. Plus Embry made an appearance again, and the garden was referenced again. I am beyond excited to see where this is going. ~Vicki~

  19. As always, great job. Now Carlisle is really scarring me...he is one sick puppy. I hope Bella tells Edward before Carlisle does something big. Thanks for the update...I always look forward to it! April

  20. Great chapter , didn`t understand CPOV first but after re-reading it was a bit more clear :D
    It is just so cuute the way Edward treats Bella , really lovely
    please keep updating ,the best history ever

  21. I loved this chapter! I liked that Edward stood up to Carlisle, without real confrontation. I hope that is a foreshadow of what is to come. I'm also glad that Bella's trust wasn't broken when she wore the jeans and shirt, Edward reacted as she thought he would and I think Emmett and Jasper will be amazed at the different Edward. They haven't really been around him since they got back because Edward went straight to the meeting so it'll be interesting to see their interactions.

  22. Mic! i love it! if i didn't get your twitter msg.. i wouldn't have even thought to look here... i guess i am not good at alerts and stuff! anyhow! CPOV was crazy awesome! totally was taken by surprise about the love admission... and i am just dying to know what is the secert in Esme's garden! bravo. Love it. :)

  23. Another great chapter, but that's no surprise.
    Do you know, I think next month, or maybe January, it will be a year since I started reading this?

    Opening with Carlisle POV, a complete surprise. Can't wait to see how he reacts to the change in Bella and Edward's relationship.

  24. Loved the chapter. Thanks for the update. It looks like Edward's excitement about Bella's love on her terms is overriding Carlisle's control over him. Go Edward!!!!!!!

  25. I loved how Edward was with Bella, even with Daddy C around!

  26. I love how E was with Bella in this chapter... and I want her to find complete safety. The whole pregnant Rose thing was funny, too. Loved it. I hope this Carlisle meets and ending like Charlie and James... Ugh, too creepy!


    seriously i was was freaked out when i started

    now im like awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww lol

    i love the fact that he is being Bella's Edwards even with the monster around!

    he is soo cute!

    seriously ONE OF MY FAV CHPT

  28. I had a feeling that Carlisle may have been in love with Renee. He's such a sick fuck! I love that Bella and Edward are growing so close. Edward is making changes to himself and how he's interacting with the others in the family. Esme must have loved Edward's expression of love to her when he was leaving the kitchen. I'm so proud of him for stopping when Bella asked him to and also for letting her know that she didn't need to do anything for him although he certainly enjoyed it.

  29. Wow. Carlisle was in love with Renee? Creepy. And now he wants Bella to take her place? Creepier.

    Who was Embry? I cannot remember! He seems familiar... And apparently, he's known them for 10 years? Who exactly was he?! A neighbor? I remember you mentioning Bella's neighbor and a computer guy a while ago...? Jeez. Can't remember.

    Anyhoo, I loved this Edward!! Made me happy. :D And I love how he didn't tell her to not dress in jeans and to wear shoes and stuff with Carlisle around.

  30. So glad to see the alert - I wondered how that would work! Wonderful chapter! I did worry that Carlisle would have them watched, and I was right. I think Embry did have something to do with Phil and Renee's deaths.

    I worry that Edward has taken things too far in the other direction, though. His attitude is sure to get a rise out of Carlisle (who we all know to be an extremely sick, perverted man). And I know that Edward told Bella she would not have to pretend to be Bella Barbie ever again, but she needs to figure out that it is a survival tactic while they are still living in Carlisle's house. Hope RL lets you write more!

  31. I'm a little confused about Carlisle's pov, but it seems he loved Renee and thinks Bella should have been his child. But then why does he want to have relations with her and why is he so cruel.

    Can't wait to find out, because this story is so great :) Great chapter :) I really enjoyed the way Edward treated Bella throughout the whole chapter.

    P.S. I love the little bit between Emmett and Rosalie. Emmett is my favorite character so I enjoyed that :)

  32. I loved that chapter. Edward has finally learned after many mistakes and Bella has learned to love him. =] That was nice when he was willing to stop when she said she needed too. I like how Edward didn't make her stop acting like herself when they were home. He didn't react badly when she was wearing normal clothes. In fact, he didn't react at all. I also like his dismissive attitude towards carlisle and how he just carried bella out. It was a cute reunion. Can't wait for the next chapter.

  33. What a revelation of a sick and demented man. Because he couldn't get the mother he wants the daughter as a replacement! With this info it worries me what he'll do next especially with Edward's reaction to his comment to Bella upcoming home.
    She was never intend for Edward then, it was all a ruse to get his hands on her. That bastard!
    I think Jasper is right they need to return to Bella Barbie until they have enough to be rid of that bastard however possible.
    I think Embry had something to do with Bells parents death somehow, I'm not sure though.
    I loved the family time between Bella and Esme and the car ride with Em and Rose cracked me up at Rose's moods and cravings. So sweet Em's reactions and reassurance.
    So proud of Bella bravely taking a step forward in her intimacy with Edward.
    With these steps forward and some revelation I looking forward anxiously to what's next....

  34. Loving it as always :) She needs to tell him though...NOW! It's getting scary! I keep holding my breath with each chapter waiting for the Heartfail to come back!!! And DYING to know what's in Esme's garden!! You're awesome :)

    Keep up the great work!


  35. Well, the Carlisle thing confused me a little, I mean if he claims to love Renee why let her be beaten by Charlie? and if Bella was to be treated like a princess, why let her go through all that abused with Charlie?

    More over, if he knew where Renee was and he was so in love with her. Why did he allow her to be with Phil? If that was him showing his love for her, why (and this is speculation. I could be far off based on this) 'possibly' cause her death and arrange for the daughter, he claims to have always wanted, to come back to his hell hole?

    I predict that his plan was to get Bella back here and trained to meet his every fantasy he had with Renee. Eww.

    Anyway, I really hope that he gets stopped in his sick twisted plan no matter what it is.

    And I'm dying to know what is up with Esme's garden!!

    As for E & B, Awwww. I loved their interaction. I really liked the part in the kitchen but I do fear that Carlisle is going to start tightening his leash. How?... I don't know but I can invision the shit hitting the fan.

    Please don't make us wait too long for the next update. This story is way too addicting.

  36. Loved the fluffiness that was this chapter.... I am so intrigued by what is Esme's secret with the garden??? and the fact that Carlise "loved" Renee... if he "loved" her so much why does he think raping her daughter is a good ides. He is sooooo twisted and sick. Hope all is well with your hubby Mic!

  37. I love this chapter, it is great.. As always I wanted more, you are a great writer making me want to read more and more...

  38. I love that he treated her so well, but I worry about the "other shoe dropping" when Carlisle gets a hold of Edward...

  39. Something told me to check for an update and I'm glad to see that I did!What is it that Carlisle wants to tell Edward? This is going to leave me dumbfounded until the next chapter. Oh goodness, I bet that Carlisle is going to blame Bella for Edward's change and, in return, is planning to 'take' her sooner than later. I wonder how Edward will react when Bella eventually tells him of his father's sick need for her. Will he believe her or get angry and unleash the old Edward?
    Carlisle in love with Renee? Now that's a shocker! Man, this story just keeps getting deeper and deeper. Will these boys ever get their chance to step up to their father as equals to take him down? Or will Esme finally have the sweet revenge she's always wanted by doing him in herself??

    The garden, the garden...
    Oh I have some ideas about the garden but I won't tell until you do!

    Glad you liked the pictures from the link I sent you. You might have seen them before I sent that link but I don't mind sharing them all over again. The man is truly delicious!!

    Take care!!

  40. I knew that Carlisle had to have them being watched. I'm going to assume that Embry had a hand in how Bella came to Forks, rather than going to her aunt and uncle's house.

    I was shocked to see that Carlisle loved Renee ad I wonder just what Carlisle means about making Bella his.

    I loved that Edward was openly affectionate towards his mom and Bella in front of Carlisle - though I think it will be the women who suffer most, in Edward's absence, for his behavior.

    I love that Bella gave a tiny piece of herself to Edward when she allowed him to remove her top, but I understand why she stopped him when she did.

    I also like that she gave Edward his release after getting him all worked up.

    The end was lovely, where Edward still treated her like a lady - though I wonder if Carlisle is lurking in the background some where.

    And for the love of all that is holy - what is with the garden? Please - you're killing me here ;)

    Thanks for the update, loved it as always.

  41. Great chapter!! Interaction with Edward and Bella was so sweet although I am even more worried about Carlisle. Hope that douche gets what is coming to him and soon! Esme needs to get her HEA as well.

  42. I can't believe Carlisle was after Renee, would he been different if he was with her instead??? And of course they were being watch, I thought it was Charlie that was the one the put the hit on Renee and Phil but I guess I was wrong. Carlisle is twisted, his interest in Bella was too odd for me but I guess its clear now. I hope that Bella gets the courage soon to tell Edward whats going on. I'm happy that Edward stood up to Carlisle with just simple actions. I can't wait to find out whats in the secret garden, I hope is evidence. Esme deserve a great revenge...can't wait for your next update

  43. Beautiful chapter! Edward was so sweet and had no problem with Bella's clothing or behaviour. I was afraid that after several days with Carlisle and away from Bella that he would revert to his old ways a little.

    But I am very worried about what Carlisle is up to. And he doesn't even realize how little control he has left over his family members! They are all just pretending for him.

  44. That was go good.. I am so glad that Edward is leting her take her time. It kept a smile on my face through this whole story. I love the way Bella and Esma are so close.

    I do not like the fact that Charlise is up to something. I dont like the way he was in love with Renee. I am scared for Bella and what will happen if he does something bad to her.. How Edward will reacte. If he will take sides and say Bella must of started it or if he will take side and stand by her. I just hope it will work out for the best..

    Please post next chapter soon.. I just cant get enough. Thanks for the Great story..

  45. okay this story pwns me every single time!!!! CPOV freaked me out a lil...i'm sensing some serious drama is coming!!!

    Bella's time with Edward...it seems that Bella thinks that she has nothing to fear anymore...but we know better don't we? How is Edward going to protect her?

  46. I SO agree with the comment above ^^
    This story totally pwns me too, seriously. I'm going to be late now because fuck me if I thought I was going to leave the house before I read this. NOW WAY.
    SO good and so eager to see what's going to happen. I feel like something bad is coming... ooh, exciting!

  47. WHOAH CPOV!!!! amazing stupid bastard though jeez
    loved the rest of it though it was AWESOME
    edward is being so sweet and caring now and bella is rewarding him for it :P

  48. This story is amazing! So from the CPOV and re-reading of the one-shot, I think that the day Embry locks himself out he goes to the garage to get his spare key and somehow sabotages Renee's car. She mentions that she's picking Bella and Phil up and we know he keeps his spare key in the garage. That is the day Phil and Renee die.
    Ugh Carlisle is one evil puppy, I almost read this story looking through my fingers wondering what he is going to do next.
    Edward and Bella were beautiful, but I cannot help but think it will have implications for Bella and Esme with the way Edward treated Carlisle. Perhaps Carlisle will come home from work early *shudder*.
    Keep up the amazing writing and please not so long for an update next time. You're killing me!

  49. Ok honesty here ... Carlisle just scared the bejeebus out of me. I worry for Edward and Bella. But I also worry for what this could mean for Esme.

    Edward taking Bella to their room .... LOVED IT! I bounced in my chair and cheered! I felt Bella's glee over Edward's actions and I happily clapped.

    Such a good chapter! Mostly fluff. But soooo good. Can't wait for the next.

  50. OMG I loved this chapter and all the changes in Edward.....but who the heck could that guy who was watching Bella and Edward be....I am so glad that Carsile didn't find out about how Edward is giving him more Freedom and all that stuff. I am looking forward to reading when Bella finally tells Edward she loves him and Edward finds out at Carsile. I just know those chapters are gonna rock. I loved this chapter and can't wait for more!!!!!!

  51. So wait...Are you saying that Embry was sent by Carlisle to watch Renee all those years ago? I'm guessing that was the point of putting him in the outtake. That's kinda creepy. Although everything in this story is.

    I'm slowly but surely falling back in love with EC. I knew all hope wasn't lost.
    I can't wait for Carlisle to be put in his place.

  52. Ugh Carlisle is so evil. And he wants Bella.... So Embry was somehow involved in all of this.

    Love that Edward was so sweet on his return.

  53. Awww... this one was so cute and sweet. And I am so proud of both of them for standing up to Carlisle and it was just perfect. They made huge progress. As always I can't wait for your next chapter!

  54. This chapter was amazing. First I cannot believe that Carlisle loved Renee. Actually I do not think that he is able to love someone. He did say that he wished he had claimed Renee that is not really very loving. I really think that Carlisle had a hand in the deaths of Renee and Phill. I do not think that he intended for Renee to die.

    I loved the interactions with Emmett and Rose. I have to admit I was hoping that they were having a girl. I wanted Emmett to have to be all over protective of her with Carlisle. I can only imagine that Carlisle would not want a granddaughter.

    I loved the interactions between Bella and Esme. I want to know what is in Esme's garden.

    I loved how Edward was with Bella. That he did not change back into Carlisle's Edward. I had feared that might happen because he was alone with him at the conference. I am happy that Bella loves Edward now.

  55. Such a sweet chapter...except for Carlisle's shit. I'm hoping he's not planning on killing Esme and Edward to get Bella...he's obviously crazy enough to do it.

    Can't blame Rose for worrying, but Emmett is manning-up and proving what kind of man he really is.


    Oh my God u have them followed.. I can't believe it. But that's fine.. Edward taught him his lesson at home. The scene was amazingly beautiful. LOVED the chapter. u're the best!

  57. wow carlisle bein in luv with renee was a total shocker... so he wants to marry belle now rite??? loved the chap and i m so happy wid the new edward

  58. carl said that he isn't ready to reveal everything to edward yet so i'm wondering if he actually thinks that edward would agree to share bella or if he thinks that he would give bella to him without any sort of fight either way he must be deluded.
    great chap I can't wait for the next one

  59. I loved this chapter.Especially the Bella/Edward interaction.He's actually likeable now.Carlise is one scary SOB I wonder what he has planned. Anyway I can't wait to read the next post:)

  60. OMG Carlisle is so creppy. i hope Bella tell Edward what his father plans to do with her before Carlisle rape her.

  61. I absolutely love the progress that edward is making not only with bella but with his mother as well. we saw that emotionally break through that him and emse had last chapter and this chapter we see him start growing off of that and with bella. He has changed a ton and once their house is done being built things will just keep getting stronger and stronger with bella and edward. I cant wait to see what's next for these love birds. and cant wait for bella to finally tell edward that she is in love with him. i love this edward and how hes treating bella just keeps getting better and better but then there's carlisle, the sick fuck, who just doesnt go away haha. i knew there had to be some alterior motive other than him just wanted to fuck her. god he is into some freaky shit too.. cant wait for the next chapter and for bella to tell edward about his demented father so he can kick his ass. great no amazing chapter i loved it. cant wait for the next!:)

  62. I wasn't expecting Carlisle to have been in love w/Renee. Frankly I didn't think him capable of that emotion. I'm not entirely convinced that he is, but it's interesting know he *thinks* he loved her. And really, treat Bella like a "princess"? Now I'm dying to find out what the heck made Carlisle turn into such a monster. And what his plans for B are.

    I can totally see Carlisle taking his frustration with Edward's actions out on Esme and Bella. Esp since E called Esme "mom" right in front of him, after essentially "allowing" B to wear jeans and not act like a slave! B better hurry up and say something to someone, even Alice or Rose, about what Carlisle's been up to before it's too late!!

    Thank you so much for sharing, I can't wait for the next chapter!!

  63. So, Carlisle's revelation shocked the hell out of me. I am so confused by his thoughts. If he wished Bella was his own, why would he allow her to be treated that way if he wanted to treat her like a princess? And that ending shot, he would have Bell...what does that mean??? AHHHH...

    I kinda wanted to smack Bella a little when everyone was trying to help her but she was so adamant about not pretending anymore. I have a bad feeling that someone will suffer because of this choice.

    However, with all that said...I LOVED the reunion. This Edward is soo amazing and sweet and I fucking love him. I hope that he stays this way because we know that Carlisle is going to say something about that little reunion display.

  64. Waw! I lost the alerts for this. Finally catching up.

    WTF? Renee? Carlisle was “in love” (I hardly believe such a creature as him is capable of real love) with Renee?

    Nooo! Not Embry too. I had a bad feeling about him in the Renee outtake, but still it is sad to see it be true. This means Carlisle has had his eye on them for a long time now, right. And Embry had all this access to the house and their internet and such. :( Evil!

    Sick f**ker! One minute his is thinking of his love for Renee and how Bella should have been his daughter and the next he is thinking of Bella as his woman. How crazy is this sicko?!?!? Please, tell me his is not getting his way anymore. I beg you!

    Well, better Emmett pick her up from school then those creepy security guys.

    So very true, and I’m so proud of him for it. :)

    I really feel bad for Esme. Sure the girls went through hell, but so did she and I think she is too far gone to ever be able to be romantically happy, or maybe not... She is so strong. I wish her so much happiness for the rest of her life.

    Heheheh Bella and I are kind of thinking in the same lines. And although I got how each part, plant in the garden represents someone for her; I still don’t fully understand what is up with the whole secret behind the garden. Did I miss it? Or is that still to be fully revealed?
    So I guess that is still to come. But it must be somehow depressing, if she is so unwilling to share it with Bella.


    I’m glad that had no big consequences for her. I know Jasper would not react to it, but Emmett might. Was he even there? I hope Edward keep up to her expectations.

    She sounds like such a little girl right there. I hope she is right. :)

    They can be so cute together. :) I wish there wasn’t so much still in the way of their happiness. :(

    Thank you! :D this is a great start to show Carlisle things are not as they used to be. :)

    It is funny how these simple little attitudes from Bella can make me so happy. I can see each one as a small victory for them. :)

    At least she is starting to embrace that truth slowly. ;) Alice really was right.


  65. ... Continued

    I only hope she is not too late to tell him. Carlisle is a very dangerous man.

    Again, this is all very different. I read a lot of smut fic and I love it. Btu here anything remotely sexual is kind of tricky. I feel more guarded than even Bella at this point. And in a way it means more and less. She is already familiar to the acts, but when she goes into them freely it means so much more. It is a weird (intresting, but weird) feeling it evokes.

    See? It means so much more for her to let herself have this intimacy, to be able to freely embrace this kind of pleasure. They have really done a number on her. :(

    I’m so proud of Edward for accepting and abiding by her request to stop. He is becoming a real man, not a monster, finally. :D

    Hhehehe I should keep reading further before I comment. It seems that your writing is just a few lines behind my thoughts. :P

    For any man to try to refuse oral sex is amazing, for Edward to do so is incredible! :D He just has to find a way to get his father locked up and life will be grand! ;)

    It just kind of makes me sad to remember how she learned how to do this. I’m glad she is so filled with good emotions to realize this. But I guess she is not yet ready to swallow, and who can blame her.

    Awesome! I’m so very happy right now I can kind of ignore sick Carlisle at the beginning. :P

    You have a lot on your plate, but you still keep your magic going when you write. Great chapter.

  66. I loved this chapter. I'm glad Emmett and Edward are changing.

    hmm....Carlisle is a mystery!!!!!!!!

  67. OMG I hate Carlisle, I fear the moment Edward leaves Bella alone with Carlisle she has to tell Ed!!!!!
    Lovely chapt!!!

  68. I'm so glad Edward is sticking to his promise and choosing Bella and Esme over his father. I just hope that Carlisle doesn't get too angry and take it out on Esme.

  69. this story is truly fascinating, and amazing well-written to boot!

  70. I've got to say I'm wondering what Carlisle thought at the end. The fact that he knows what went on during their vacation scares me.

  71. Well that threw me for a loop. I wasn't expecting Carlisle to have been in love with Renee. At all. And it scares me that he still wants to make Bella "his".

    I was so proud of Edward for taking up for Bella in the kitchen. But I still sense that shit is gonna hit the fan soon.

  72. Wait, Carlisle was in love with Renee the whole time! No wonder he's bitter.

    But man is he sick!!

    Can I just say that Edward REDEEMED himself in my eyes!! He made me *swoon* when he kissed Esme on the cheek!!

    I wonder what's going on with Esme's garden. Does she have a poisonous flower that she plans on giving Carlisle when she's absolutely fed up? hmmm...food for thought, no pun intended! LOL

  73. OMG! Carlisle always wanted Renee...now he wants Bella? How does he plan to do that? How does he want her...like a wife, mistress? Embry has been watching Bella for years? Poor Bella, Sick sick Carlisle. I wonder if Esme got in trouble for Edward calling her mother?

    Oh and Edward is being so sweet to Bella. He didn't defy Carlisle in so many words, but taking Bella out of the kitchen and calling Esme mother, that was wonderful. Oh and Bella really loves 'her' Edward. She doesn't trust totally though....how will Edward prove to her that she is safe? Can he?

    This is nerve-wracking wondering what Carlisle is up to! Thank you for writing!

  74. Carlisle loved Renee? Wow. And Embry WAS a plant all along... dammit! I can't even begin to imagine how Esme would react to this, or what might happen to Bella...

    And I'm afraid for what Carlisle is going to do in retaliation to Edward's treatment of Bella and Esme... I sincerely hope Esme and Bella don't bear the brunt of it, but you can be damn sure SOMETHING will happen...

    As for Bella, I really do think Carlisle's going to be after her in fine form, and letting Edward know exactly what he thinks of how Bella is dressed and treating him... I wouldn't be surprised if he was watching that dinner...

    Loved Edward in this. Loved that he openly defied his father in so many little ways, and that he kept his promise to Bella. I just worry about the fallout from that...

  75. I was totally proud of Edward for not backing out and treating her the same in front of Carlisle. The new twist about Carlisle loving Renee was unexpected and adding an extra creepiness to what Carlisle might do to Bella. I hope she tells Edward soon, before Carlisle has a chance to do anything. Awesome chapter.

  76. By the way, I love the Bella and Edward artwork at the beginning of the chapter.

  77. awww, short & fluffy! :)

    I really hate Carlisle! lol

  78. Carlisle is an ass!
    I love this Edward. I can't wait for them to move out of that house.